Worried sick of possible HIV infection


I am new to this site but have found great info. here. I have searched archives and found some answers but have a wierd possible exposure story. I am male heterosexual, 85 days ago I went to an oriental massage parlor. Female of unknown status gave me a soap bath while i was laying naked on table, when got back to room she gave me a massage all over while i was naked laying on a table. After that she used hand (no condom, had lubricant but did not know what kind of lube, possible oil), when I was erect she put condom on with mouth and gave oral for short time then I gave vaginal sex for short time (no ejaculation by me, don't know about her). Then she took off condom and used hand again. I then had her put on another condom and she gave me oral for a few minutes and I had vaginal sex with her few minutes or so. When close to ejaculation she finished me with oral(can't remember if my ejaculation was in her vagina or mouth, but condom on). When done I started to take off condom, but she did it for me (I did touch it, though). After exposure, got really worried and filled with guilt. Within week of exposure got tested for, HIV, Syph., Gon., Chlam., and herpes (all negative). In same week of exposure got rash in creases of groin area (Dr. said was jockitch, got treated and it went away), In that same week of exposure I had one night of night sweat (sweat was from chest up), headache, loss of appetite, couldn't sleep. After I got those tests back after that week, those symptoms went away and I can't remember having any symptoms maybe some diarrhea, headaches, upset stomach. On day 52 after exposure, I went for walk and sweated in my groin area. Next day got rash in creases of groin area again (Dr. said was jockitch, got treated and went away). Got really worried and filled with guilt again. As of two weeks ago (approximately day 68) I have had pain/headache across my eyes, itchy eyes, (is allergy season here, but not use to having symptoms like these) pain in lower to uper back and some in shoulders to neck, stuffy/runny nose, dull ache in groin area, itchyness in groin area, red scrotum, slight burning sensation around waist line and chest and under armpits, headache, a few nightsweats (two were heavy, sweating from chest up and few were not drenching), cough (some dry, some producing green phlem, some producing clear phlem), one small blood sore in mouth, dry mouth, small red dots on tongue, Corner of one eye is slightly red/irritated, white covering on tongue and itchyness around my knees. These symptoms were not constant and not concurring. I went to Dr. on day 59, and got tested for all above mention STD except HIV (he said to wait for 3 months from exposure for that one). He dignosed me with Sinus infection (got treated and felt somewhat better). All those tests at that time were negative also. I planned to get tested next week (3 month test approximate day 94 days after exposure). Other info. about possible exposure: I couldn't tell if either condom failed/broke (my penis never poked out like head through sweater), Didn't know what kind of lube she used (was in unmarked bottle, she watered it down in her hand with mist bottle before placement), Didn't know what kind of condoms she used (she would leave the room and come back with a red condom not in package), I did sometimes touch the codom after been in her (Mouth and vagina)while moving around.


  1. what is possible exposure statistics in this situation?
  2. How does a latex condom break if used oil lube? Does it break (head poking through sweater) or just tiny holes that you can't see?
  3. If 3 month (94 days after exposure) is negative, do I need futher testing?
  4. what test do I need to take and should most clinics have the newest technology for testing (I live in Large metro area)

I thank you for your time in this lenghty questions. Can I donate using a credit/check card?



  1. "Statistics for this situation?" Dude, do you really think we collect risk statistics for every single possible set of variables that can occur while two people are having nookie? The best I can offer is that if the latex condom was used properly and didn't break, your HIV risk would be essentially nonexistent.

  2. Oil-based lube can denature latex, weakening it such that the risk of breakage increases.

  3. Nope.

  4. HIV-antibody test (ELISA, EIA, rapid test). If you live in a metropolitan area, the HIV testing should be very reliable (FDA-approved testing kits of any generation).

  5. Your problem is related to your guilt surrounding this event. Your symptoms are much more suggestive of anxiety than HIV!

  6. Thank you for your tax-deductible donation to the Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation. We accept all forms of payment: PayPal, personal check, credit card, direct wire deposits from banks, cashier's check, cash, appreciated securities, etc. Donation information can be found on the foundation's Web site at www.concertedeffort.org. In return, I'm sending you my good-luck karma that your definitive HIV test will be negative.

Good luck.

Dr. Bob