worried about high risk for HIV

Question

yes i am a current worry well. I've written in several times (and even donated - hoping that it not only helps others but provides me with a bit of good karma). I had sex (vaginal)for the first time over a week ago. Didn't use protection. Right now, feeling awful, guilty, alone, anything you can think of. I can't find this in the archives - is risk for HIV enhanced when you're having sex for the first time? Also, why wasn't I told about PEP when I was in the 72 hour period?? I'm so distraught and nervous, I have a sore throat and swollen glands, ache in lower back and I just feel miserable. Any words would be appreciated at this point. I don't know who else to turn to. Thanks for answering the many questions of fellow WWs like myself. Unfortunately, my story isn't one that is low-risk (like watching prostitutes masturbate and all the other stories i've read about on this site!) My story is just a regular old-fashioned STUPID MISTAKE. I hope I do not have to pay for it. I have honestly learned my lesson and learned a lot about HIV in the process. THANKS!

Answer

Hello,

"Is the risk for HIV enhanced when you're having sex for the first time?" No, the risk is exactly the same each time. For unprotected insertive vaginal sex with an HIV-positive partner, the estimated HIV-transmission risk is 5 per 10,000 exposures each and every time you dip your wick. This is a per-act risk estimate. The estimated risk would be lower if you don't know the HIV status of your partner.

As for why you were not told about PEP, I have no idea. However, I should also point out that most specialists would not recommend PEP for this degree of potential risk, unless there were extenuating circumstances. PEP itself has risks.

The odds remain overwhelmingly in your favor that you did not contract HIV from this first time sexperience. A three-month HIV test will provide you with a definitive result. Considering your degree of anxiety over this issue, you might consider some counseling to help you cope with the stress of "window pain."

Thank you for your donation. Good karma is indeed on its way to you from both me and the higher powers!

Good luck!

Dr. Bob