Dr Bob, Recently I have been working overseas, on my return home I was in transit in Bangkok, this meant a one night stay over. My situation is this.
During the stay over I met who I thought was a very beautiful Thai girl at my hotel bar, as it would turn out it was a very beautiful male! I found this out in my room later. I have never been with a male before this, our sex included her/him giving me oral and me penertrating with a condom, I did not finish inside but completed my climax by way of her masturbating me!
I know that I am negative as I have only just recently had a complete blood test and semen analysis, my long term partner is having difficulty getting pregnant. I now feel racked with guilt because of my lack of judgement.
My mind does not stop thinking that something has happened, and I am consumed by this. My partner has just had a shot for rubella and we are using condoms at present.
I just worry about the level of HIV in Thailand and that somehow I may have contracted the virus.
Another very worried person.
Oh, by the way, the photo on your blog, man you look buffed!
Hello Another Very Worried Person,
So that song "One Night in Bangkok" is really true:
"One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster. The bars are temples but the pearls ain't free. You'll find a god in every golden cloister. And if you're lucky then the god's a she. I can feel an angel sliding up to me."
Your HIV-acquisition risk is extremely low, assuming the latex condom was used properly and did not break. HIV cannot permeate intact latex. No way. No how. Oral sex carries only a very small risk of HIV transmission/acquisition.
Your real problem is being "racked with guilt." I suggest you level with your partner. Even though your HIV risk is extremely low, you may decide together to continue using condoms until your three-month HIV test definitively reconfirms your negative HIV status. Leveling with your partner is not only the best way to confront your guilt; it's also the right thing to do.
Glad you liked the blog photo.