Moving on from October ... finally feeling better, glad to be home here in sunny California and starting to feel the seasons change! Yes we have them -- don't let people tell you otherwise! It's the month of thanks and I have a ton to be thankful for. I guess it was that coming-to-Jesus meeting in the hospital when my fevers were so high and I literally thought "OK, God, I'm not gonna make it am I?" Well, since I did make it out I have turned a new leaf. I'm taking my meds. My numbers are going up -- not quite undetectable but pretty darn close. Not sure I need to be and not gonna stress over it really. Doc is happy. I'm happy. Trying to see if I can stabilize off the Neupogen and clear the neutropenia. To rid myself of twice-weekly injections right now would be pretty cool!
My physical therapy team, whom I have come to adore, shockingly, has me doing Pilates twice a week and deep tissue massage and laser treatments weekly and I am actually not only complying but actually enjoying my sessions. I am working daily on my brain games and while the computer keeps kicking my butt each day I get better and better at them and can see improvement. The memory matrix, math problem solving, and some dual focus problem solving issues are still paramount challenges for me.
Patiently waiting to see if I'll qualify for some sort of DMV evaluation to assess any possibility of getting my driving privileges reinstated in the near future; I'm not pushing the issue as I once was. I'm not even sure if I was to join the ranks of everyday L.A. drivers again that I would jump at the everyday driving occurrence. I may save it as a once-in-a-while treat for myself. I'm just not really sure how I feel about it all right now -- the jury is still out on all of that and, believe me, I'm sure I have plenty of time to chew on it while the DMV and medical teams sort it all out.
Meanwhile, in other news: We found this amazing deal on a very cool digital piano on Craigslist and I immediately couldn't wait to start playing again. Our old piano had died which I didn't think possible with digital but nevertheless the manufacturer had gone out of business and there was no way to get parts so we were waiting and waiting until we found the right deal. Now, mind you, I hadn't really played in years; I had given up playing for a variety of reasons but now for who knows why I was finding myself wanting to play so we went searching and I was ecstatic to find a steal.
To my surprise with all my memory issues once I started playing it sounded like I had when I was a teen. Almost all my memories came back to me and I was sounding pretty good, a little rusty but still overall decent. It's amazing to me; I can't wait to share that with my neurologist. I wonder what she'll say. I find the brain and all its intricacies very interesting. I would like to have my memory back, though, in all its other forms.
My other new purchase -- and yes I did say I have a lot to be thankful for and yes I know it's not all about material things and if you knew me you'd know I hardly ever buy anything but this is something I've been truly wanting ever since my neuropathy and overall muscle weakness and chronic pain has begun. We finally invested in one of those walk-in tubs! It is a beauty, top-of-the-line tub. It has the chromotherapy, aromatherapy, like 21 jets or something -- it's crazy and so funny and is nearly a third of my height. The installation guys were great and I was able to get a prescription for hydrotherapy and the tub classifies as a medical device so it is a tax write-off as well. The physical therapists and my medical team are delighted and the first soak was divine. Even my husband and kids love it! It truly is a Godsend and something I can truly enjoy and take comfort in.
So, you see I have been busy doing a lot of pampering and taking care of me. Maybe that's what my coming-to-Jesus moment was really about: finding time for me, working on me and trying to get my act together so that I can truly be there for everyone else. Women tend to overlook that the most. I know that; I think all women know that. It just takes so much pushing and prodding to move us to action.
This month of Thanksgiving, above all else, I am thankful that God has given me life and surrounded me with blessings of family, friends, opportunity, fun, joy, happiness, comfort, peace, health, challenge, patience, faith and hope.
From my home and heart to yours, I hope God continues to show his mercy and love and that you continue to give thanks!
Until next time,