My Search for Meaning

A Video Blog

When I got my first position at an HIV/AIDS organization in 1987, I thought the job would be my last. I was HIV positive, living in Los Angeles and surrounded by fear and dying. How could I possibly be here to type this blog to you now?

It's a blessing and a curse of sorts. Why me, why now ... why ask why?

If you've been faced with your own mortality -- whether it was 20 years ago like me or if you tested HIV positive last week -- there comes a time when you have to ask what the meaning of this diagnosis is. That confusion and sense of meaninglessness was the engine of my drug addiction (or did the addiction create the loss of meaning?). At any rate, I talked to three key people who helped me sort it out: Dr. Jesse Peel, who is a retired psychiatrist living with AIDS; my own physician, Dr. David Morris; and a longtime gay Christian activist, Rev. Chris Glaser.

Episode Nine: My Search for Meaning

It turns out there is a common thread in their beliefs and worldviews. I hope you enjoy their takes on life, death and meaning. And I look forward to your own opinions of what the hell (or heaven) our existence means!

In the meantime, my friends, please be well. And good luck on your journey.


To contact Mark, click here.