Hello Dr Robert, i am very scared. On february the 9th this year i went to a sex worker she performed oral sex on me with a condom and then licked my balls and rimmed me. Towards the end of are encounter she was sucking me and the condom was coming off, it felt so good that i told her to take it off and suck me unprotected, which she did for about 30 seconds whereupon i came in her mouth. Afterwards this got me thinking how many other men had she sucked and received their cum in her mouth. Since week two of are encounter i have had non stop Nausea, very loose stools, Night sweats on week two for about five days, my Testicules swelled up and were painful to the touch and my jaw felt tight and painful sometimes, plus i had shooting pains under my armpits for several days. From week two i felt hot then cold when i touched my forehead. The night sweats were accompanied by burning sensations in my arms and fingers. Week four i started getting tingling and burning sensations in my toes and fingers. It felt like someone was stabbing my fingers with a pin.
I tried to avoid sex with my girlfriend but i twice had to give her Oral sex and deep french kissing. This happened after she brushed her teeth so maybe her gums were bleeding. From week two she has had headaches and has been very tired a lot of the time and recently she has been feeling Nausea with a stomach pain plus her nails have been cracking very easily and the skin round the nails is fragile and bleeds sometimes. I'm sure i have HIV.
Two years ago i had a test and was negative. I said to myself that i would not put myself through this stres again but i am addicted to sex workers. I feel terrible i have not only ruined my life but my girlfriends who has just graduated from university. Her family will want to kill me and mine as well because they like her so much. I do not think she could handle taking Meds everyday or that her body could cope with the side effects. All i see in the future now is lonliness and financial hardship if i am unable to work.
Sorry Dr Robert if that was long, my thoughts are not cohesive at the moment as i have been drinking and taking drugs heavily to take away the thoughts of living with HIV. You are truly a remarkable man and very funny!! The Heineken man answer was great!!! Peace i am from the UK by the way.
You are "sure" you have HIV. I, on the other hand, am anything but sure!
The risk of acquiring HIV from insertive oral sex is remote at best.
Your symptoms are much more consistent with anxiety, depression and guilt than with HIV.
Your worries about your girlfriend's not being able to cope with the side effects of HIV drugs are shockingly premature, as is your vision of your future filled only with loneliness and financial hardship. Aren't we being just the tiniest bit overdramatic here??? Let's ratchet the negativism down several thousand degrees with a dose of reality, OK?
The estimated per-episode risk for acquisition of HIV resulting from unprotected insertive oral sex with an HIV-positive partner is 0.5 per 10,000 exposures. Your estimated risk would be even less, as we do not know the HIV status of your Naughty Lady from Shady Lane. Next, while" testicules" that swell up and are painful to the touch sound quite dreadful, this plus the majority of the other symptoms you describe are not consistent with HIV ARS (acute retroviral syndrome). As for your girlfriend, the chances you transmitted your nonexistent HIV infection to her via oral sex and French kissing are beyond nonexistent.
My advice is simple:
You need psychological help to address multiple concerns, including your irrational and unwarranted fears of HIV as well as your "addiction" to sex workers.
Level with your girlfriend. It's not only the best way to confront your guilt; it's also the right thing to do.
Lay off the booze and drugs. They certainly aren't helping your rational thought processes or your rosy disposition.
Get an HIV rapid test at the three-month mark. It will undoubtedly be negative.
When you realize you are indeed definitively HIV negative, yell WOO-HOO louder than when that weirdo shoved the Heineken up his heinie.