My Depression, Trauma, HIV and Getting Help

I have been going through one of the roughest times of my life and I wanted to show the world that it is ok to be a strong woman and ask for help at the same time. Being a part of the Greater Than AIDS campaign for HIV and IPV resurfaced many issues I had that I thought had healed ... but the reality is that I was just glued together ... I had not healed and now I am in intensive therapy for the first time in my life.

I was in a very dark space ... greater than any other pain I had felt before and I really wanted to end the pain and just be free. I am so happy my wife pushed for us to get help, individually and together! This saved my life and maybe our marriage.

Thank you to Krista for your words and love, and all of those that gave me advice and courage - Krista, Eddie Hamilton, Sean Black, Martha Laing, Susan, and so many more that reached out!! And MOST IMPORTANTLY, My Wife, Lisa, and my mother who has always been and will be my rock and Foundation and GOD who means everything to me in this journey we call life.

Life is a path of roses filled with thorns! I was thinking ... should I wait to get better to do my video blog about what is really going on? And I said NO! I want it to be now ... while I am going through it, and I hope to make a video soon saying I am better ... MUCH BETTER.

I think you can see it in my eyes. I am tired and I am puffy from crying ... but I am on the road to finding myself and recovery.

Much love and light.