Lifelong chronic masturbator that stepped into the darkness


I'm a 25 year old gay male that only recently lost his virginity to a high risk individual. I had receptive anal sex twice with the individual, both times with condoms (not sure if he kept them on the whole time though), and gave oral twice (tasted only precum). I also licked his anus (I can't believe I did that) and had anal sex once where he was the receiver (without a condom: he didn't like the idea of being fuc*ed, so I got desperate and eventually got it in). Day after had headaches. A week later I had a swollen lymph gland at groin (but most likely from an ingrown toenail that was pussing). Two weeks after potential exposure got cold with slight fever (99.4 at highest). Four weeks later (today) have had mild muscle and joint aches and have recently taken an HIV antibody test. The needle left a huge bruise on my arm (about two inches in diameter)and my mind is convincing myself this is thrombocytopenia, a symptom of acute infection. Please, doctor, help me. I get nauseous now thinking of sex. Two days ago I went to the gym and gagged when another gay stared at me. I just want to wake up from this nightmare and return to my normal life of masturbating to internet pornography. Please tell me if it's common to get a bruise that large from blood test.


Hello Wanker in dark,

You are 25 and only recently lost your virginity??? Gosh, where do you live? Perhaps in one of the square states in the middle of the country? (OK square state folks, I'm only kidding. Don't start sending me letters.)

Your HIV risk is oral sex without ejaculation (extremely, extremely low risk), rimming (no cases of HIV transmission have ever been reported from rimming or being rimmed), protected anal receptive sex (assuming the latex condom was used properly, the HIV risk is nearly nonexistent), and unprotected insertive anal sex. The unprotected anal insertive sex is by far your greatest risk. The estimated HIV transmission risk for the receptive partner, per episode, with a partner confirmed to be HIV-positive, is 0.1 3 percent. Your risk would be lower, because you were the insertive partner, and we do not know the HIV status of your "high risk" partner.

Unprotected sex does place you at some degree of risk for STD's, including HIV. Your doctor can screen you for STD's. To get a definitive HIV test, you'll have to wait three months. Your symptoms are not worrisome to me from an HIV perspective; however, since you have placed yourself at risk, testing is warranted.

So what about the bruise? Thrombocytopenia? No, I would strongly doubt that. More likely, it's due to an inexperienced phlebotomist. Same thing happened to me just the other day. I went to have my blood drawn, and let the "trainee" draw it, because I have great veins! Well, she was more than a bit nervous about my HIV status. She really made a mess of things, and I wound up drawing most of the blood myself. I was left with an impressive hematoma (bruise mark) and my platelet count is just fine.

Now what's this nonsense about getting nauseous when you think about sex? You sound like one of those right wing religious conservative talk show hosts! Sex is a wonderful invention! Gosh, I wish I had the patent! Maybe the guy at the gym was just cruising you? Maybe he was looking at your bruise. So what. Just tell him, "Never let Emelda McShakeyhands draw your blood."

Wanking off in the dark to "men4men4hot sex now" is fine, but sex really isn't just a spectator sport. Just remember to play safe, and you'll stay safe. You lost your judgment when you "got desperate and eventually got it in" (without a condom). Condoms may be inconvenient, but they can prevent HIV and even the worry of HIV. Condoms, like lubrication, are your friends!

The odds are all in your favor that you did not contract HIV from this episode. You'll need a test at three months to confirm your negative status. We'll all be sending you our best karma for a negative result!

Good luck.

Dr. Bob