It's a Friday night. It's the amazing three-day weekend, the half-day schedule, the after-work happy hour -- or, you simply got off work at your normal time and you're at home catching up on crap television. You receive a text from your favorite top and he says, "Hey sexy, I'm in your area. Can I come through now?"
The panic begins and you are immediately overwhelmed. Your home is a mess, you need to take your pet for a walk, or you may still be out and about. You know that this is one of your favorite FWBs (Friends With Benefits) and you immediately say yes, in spite of the fact that your body isn't prepared for sex. In most instances, if you're bottoming, it takes at least an hour to "get the water clear" for a night of pleasure and ecstasy.
But with these tips, you can be cleaned out in 15 minutes, more or less.
Plan Your Diet (and Don't Starve)
You can go the old-school route: starve yourself for at least a 16- to 24-hour period and live off gummy candy and water all day. Then, when it's time to use your enema, shower attachment or hot water bag (it might be before your time, but Google it; you will be tickled), it takes nothing. But not eating is not healthy regardless of someone's health status -- and even harder for people who need to take medications with food (for HIV, diabetes, etc.). So bottoms, don't starve yourselves.
Another option that I used for years is taking a full dosage of anti-diarrheal pills (Imodium A-D or its generic form, loperamide hydrochloride). All this does is stop you from having a bowel movement for 12 to 24 hours. You can eat all you want and enjoy the day, and when it's time to clean out you can be in and out of the bathroom in 15 minutes. The drawback with this is that you can create constipation. These tablets weren't meant for this purpose, and definitely should not be used on a daily basis. You have to cycle on and off them in a 48- to 72-hour period.
The third and best option is to get on a daily fiber supplement containing psyllium husk, such as Metamucil or the capsules available from Pure for Men (you can get a generic store-brand version at your local vitamin/supplement shop or health food store for dirt cheap). Taking a daily fiber supplement will keep you very regular and give you fuller and more complete bowel movements. So when you are cleaning out for sex, you will be in and out very quickly.
What You Eat Matters
Bottoming requires a proper diet. We're encouraged to eat foods that are high in fiber so that our bowel movements will be easy and regular, and will help all of the waste to leave our bodies. This occurs because our human bodies can't absorb fiber effectively. So a high-fiber diet with plenty of fruits and vegetables is important (i.e., carrots, apples, avocados, bananas, sweet potatoes, lentils, and more).
I also want to share some of my own tips. One thing I have started doing is taking a preemptive cleaning first thing in the morning when I know what the day is going to offer: It's the weekend, I live in New York City, it's summer; I know some event will be going and it's going to be men everywhere. So I start early in case something, or someone, happens to pop up later. Consuming yogurt is a good way to stabilize your stomach if it feels bubbly, wonky, or all over the place. I also learned that eating leafy vegetables is good for getting everything out because, like we mentioned before, their high fiber content does not allow them to be broken down completely, and helps with easily passing bowel movements. I treat them as intestinal street sweepers.
But it's not just what you eat -- it's also what you avoid eating. With that in mind, stay away from greasy foods. Instead of making waste slide out of you quickly, these foods do the opposite, making everything completely sticky and hard to pass. That's how you end up with those remnants of fecal waste that you thought you got all out, but missed. I have also learned that sushi is a good meal on days of hooking up and lovemaking. These tips aren't exclusive to our single and mingling queers, but also apply to our coupled queers who are trying to navigate sexual wellness, as well as any heterosexual people who engage in anal play.
Respect Your Body
In this world of hookup culture and dating, it is imperative that you treat your body well when bottoming so it can weather the experience for the long haul. It's recommended for anal health that you don't use the liquid inside store-bought enemas, but lukewarm water instead: The chemicals in the enemas are thought to irritate and dry out your rectal cavity, which increases the likelihood of tears and transmission of STIs (sexually transmitted infections) including HIV (for people who are HIV negative).
Take necessary breaks. Do your Kegels if needed and do not starve yourself. Nothing worse after bottoming than scrambling for food and eating everything in sight.
These tips will allow you to have a more normal and practical sex life. If you enjoy anal sex as the receiving partner, try some of these tips and rest assured that a few minor tweaks will have you in a less anxious, more joyous place sexually and physically.