Hi All

Thanks for a really great forum.

3 years ago I had a 1 night stand with a woman who I now know is HIV pos. Just found out (she has been positive for 5 years) I had unprotected virginal sex with her and I am now worried beyond belief...words cannot explain my situation! I developed an STD from the event 2 weeks later and was treated accordingly. I retured home to my 6 month pregnant wife and told her about what had happened, What the hell was I thinking!!! I am married with 4 kids the youngest is 2.6 years old.

So this is the situation... I abstained from having Unprotected sex with my wife until after I received my HIV test result at 3.5 months (rapid Insti NEGATIVE) at this stage I had no idea of the other ladies hiv status. Our baby was born and life went on as usual, I had a second rapid Insti test at 5.5 months also Neg. I called up the Doc after a few days to confirm my 2nd test was conclusive, he reasured me its totally conclusive and i could move on.

Its been 2.4 years since them and my wife and I were separated 5 months ago. I met someone and we dated for 3 months before having sex (unprotected as she was confirmed HIV neg.) 2 weeks later she has developed a rash on her chest,boobs and tummy (small red dots, slightly darker on her boobs) She has had very wet night sweats and high fever and has a virginal infection (yeast) she is also very tired and not sleeping well at all this week.

My wife and youngest daughter are also complaining about illness, My daughter has had a persistent cough for 2 months that comes and goes, my wife has thrush all the time and has been ill over the winter in the UK (flu)

Bearing all this in mind im convinced im HIV + I dont know what to do or who to terrified and have not slept for 4 days. The thought of telling them and explaining is over welming, I have read that if someone has ARS and gets tested the result will be 100% Pos with a 4th gen test (DR Sean response to a question) this along with the symptoms my GF is having has convinced me I am +, I know i need to go get tested again to know for sure but i just know now...

The thought of having infected half my family and my GF is beyond anything I can emagine, Im alone and have no one to talk to about this, I get back home in 2 weeks.... I dont know what to do.

Are my test results conclusive...just asking for the sake of it

Thanks for this forum guys.



Hello G,

You may be "convinced" you are HIV positive, but I'm absolutely confident you are not!

Your negative HIV-antibody tests at 3.5 and 5.5 months are conclusive. I agree with your doctor. HIV is not your problem.

Symptoms are notoriously unreliable in predicting who is and is not HIV infected. A negative HIV-antibody test outside the window period trumps symptoms each and every time.

Despite having leveled with your wife, you appear to be continuing to harbor extreme guilt about your one-nighter, which occurred while your wife had a six-month bun in the oven and four rug rats at home to care for. This level of guilt is contributing to your irrational fears surrounding HIV.

If my reassurance is not sufficient for you to shake your unwarranted worries, get another HIV test for psychological peace of mind. I'm quite confident the result will again be negative.

Now G, I have a question for you. Did you really have "VIRGINAL" sex with that one-night stand? (Considering she was subsequently found to be HIV positive, it seems doubtful!)

Dr. Bob