Gay guy gone straight!

Question

Dr Bob,

Long time reader of your sage advise, so I figured I would ask my own question. I am 30, gay, and have always played safe in the past. I've had no sexual encounters in the last year or so, and always test. But the strangest thing happened!

I hurt my back doing some lifting around the house and my Dr. sent me to a physical therapist for lower back pain. I arrive at the place, and it's an asian massage parlor! I walk in, and a nice asian girl takes me to the room where I undress and actually get a very therapeutic lower back massage. But then she starts to play with my penis! At first I was hesitatent but figured "why not, it feels good, the hell with it"

So basically, I strayed from gay and got a handjob at a massage parlor, with oil. I couldnt see if she had anything on her hands lesion wise, but my question is as follows...am I at risk for HIV from this? How about other STD's? There was no other sexual contact at all.

I've actually been all over the internet and everybody says handjobs with oil is safe sex, no worries, no nothing.

Help me out Dr, I'm still feeling like I've cheated on myself by doing this!

Answer

Hi.

Let me get this "straight". Your doctor sent you to physical therapy for treatment of lower back pain, and when you arrived the place was "Me Love You Long Times Asian Massage Parlor" and the physical therapist (aka "Nice Asian Massage Girl") massages your back and Mr. Happy with oil until you pop your cork??? WOWZA.

I can think of several reasons why this occurred:

  1. Your doctor is a sexologist named Dr. Feelgood who has a financial interest in the "Me Loves You Long Times 'Physical Therapy' Center."

  2. Your GPS is seriously screwed up, and even though you inputted the correct address for the physical therapist's office, the horny GPS took you to the local red light district for an Asian rub-and-tug.

Regarding your question, your HIV/STD risk is essentially nonexistent from this very physical physical-therapy session.

Dr. Bob