Dr Bob, i had a dodgy encounter with a South African street prostitute (very stupid)i was drunk- and used the womans condom.I was not fully erect and felt i was slipping out of the condom though not entirely-i was in there for about 5 minuets (sunday morning)-On monday morning i began sweating (after eating and after very superficial physical exertion for 2 weeks) -that evening i noticed 2 yellow lessons on my frenulum.After 1 1/2 weeks i had a dry mouth and a white toungue (hours prior to that occuring I was so nervous and anxious that i took about 8 antidepressent pils -a mild antidepressent BIRAL(4)and a level 5 (4)antidepressent (STRESSOL).
I experienced joint muscle pains, diarhea (4hrs) nausea (week7), malaise (week7) Lymph node swelling in groin area both sides/ painless(week 9)-night sweats (week 7).
I have since had 20 tests including a pcr (25days) Negative, ELIZA tests (3,5 months) and a Rapid test at 6 months.
I still have a white hairy coating on my toungue which is uncomfortable and burns depending on my anxiety levels.
I dont have a reason to believe in the tests as i have heard that in South Africa its not uncommon to test positive after the 9 month mark. I dont take IV drugs ,and im not on chemo or PEP.I am determined to test till kingdom come.What can you advise I no longer know who i am-have lost money,frends and am scared to loose my job next.
Your problem is psychological, not virological. You are definitively and conclusive HIV negative. HIV is not your problem. No way. No how. No additional HIV testing is warranted. Those are the facts. Whether you choose to believe reality is totally up to you.
Even though HIV is definitively not your problem, you do indeed have a serious medical problem that requires intervention. From reading your post, there is no doubt anxiety, depression and irrational and unwarranted fear of being HIV infected are your real problems. For example:
-- "I DON'T BELIEVE I'M NEGATIVE AFTER 6 MONTHS TEST."
-- "I was so nervous and anxious that I took about 8 antidepressant pills . . . ."
-- "I have since had 20 tests including a PCR, ELISA, and Rapid" (all negative).
-- ". . . My tongue is uncomfortable and burns depending on my anxiety levels."
-- "I am determined to test till kingdom come."
-- "I no longer know who I am . . . I have lost money, friends, and am scared to lose my job next."
My strong advice is to seek psychiatric help. You need assistance in confronting your irrational fears and accepting the truly wonderful news that you dodged the HIV bullet despite your "dodgy encounter." You now have irrefutable and overwhelming evidence you are HIV negative. Psychotherapy (counseling) and anti-anxiety/antidepressant medications can be invaluable in helping you regain both your physical and psychological well-being. Testing till kingdom come while your life falls apart around you is not a good option!