I can not understand why the hiv community think they have invented diease, suffering, and death.
Everone dies from something, instead of this denial to mortality, why doesn't our community learn to have some degree of philosophy?
Live evryday as though it's your last. It just might be.
If I were going wo have a tombstone I would want the following quote,..."He was hit by a bus."
I'm one member of the hiv community who knows we didn't "invent" disease, suffering, and death. Of course, everyone dies from something... everyone dies. I've seen a number of people who had compassion for me when everyone thought I was dying, who didn't seem to connect my dying with their own mortality, but who have since died themselves from a variety of causes. Many, many people do live in denial until they are confronted with the reality of their own mortality. And even then, it can be more painful than a soul can bear.
Sometimes people derive great comfort from denial. The pain of facing one's mortality is indescribably awful. It can be a relief from this horrid pain to be in denial. However, denial can work against a person too, when that person is in such denial that he or she does not take care of business, or seek treatment.
People arrive at a philosophical perspective on mortality at varying rates. Just because you're in tune with it, does not mean that someone else is ready to deal with it at all. In my 15 years of living with AIDS, I've seen people handle illness, death and dying in about as many different ways, and on as many different schedules, as there are people. There's no "right way" to face one's mortality.
You sound very frustrated, and probably with good cause. Can you find within yourself some compassion and understanding for those who live in denial? Can you help them lovingly face reality when they are ready, on their schedule? Can you find some compassion within yourself, for your own frustration? Have patience... which is a difficult challenge all by itself for many of us! And have compassion, both for yourself and for others.