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Weighing it up: low risk or no risk?
The risk of HIV transmission through the mouth is much smaller than through vaginal or anal intercourse or through sharing injecting equipment.
Very few cases of transmission through oral sex have been reported amongst gay men, for instance, despite the continued practice of oral sex (often with ejaculation into the mouth).
Nevertheless, since it appears that some people may have been infected with HIV through oral sex, then although oral sex seems to be safe compared to anal or vaginal intercourse, there are some factors which may increase the risk of HIV infection. These are:
Minimising any possible risks
The risk of HIV transmission through the mouth is much smaller than through vaginal or anal intercourse or through sharing injecting equipment.
Very few cases of transmission through oral sex have been reported amongst gay men, for instance, despite the continued practice of oral sex (often with ejaculation into the mouth).
Nevertheless, since it appears that some people may have been infected with HIV through oral sex, then although oral sex seems to be safe compared to anal or vaginal intercourse, there are some factors which may increase the risk of HIV infection. These are:
- Ejaculation in the mouth – in virtually all reported cases of oral transmission the infected person said they got cum in their mouth
- Disease stage; when someone is sero-converting or symptomatic, they are likely to have higher viral loads and may be more infectious
- Bleeding gums, cuts or sores in the mouth
- Inflammation caused by common throat infections, allergies or sexually transmitted infections such as gonorrhoea.
Minimising any possible risks
- You may decide that the pleasure you gain from oral sex outweighs any possible low risk of transmission, especially if oral sex makes it easier to find a very exciting alternative to fucking
- You may decide to practise oral sex except when you have any obvious cuts, sore, or inflammation in or around the mouth
- You may decide that you can suck a man's cock, but stop before you take any cum or pre–cum: this is most likely to be successful if you have agreed limits in advance of sex. It is arguable that even if you do take any in, you have still reduced an already very low risk by stopping at that point. (If you are still worried, spitting out the cum and gargling afterwards might help to reassure you)
- You may decide it could be just as much fun licking the shaft of the cock and the balls or just nuzzling the whole area round the crotch. This way you may be able to get or give some of the physical and symbolic sexual pleasure, without taking in any fluids at all. If you decide you are going to opt for even safer oral sex then it helps if you can talk about your safer sex limits beforehand rather than trying to stick to them unannounced during sex itself. It is always much harder to stick to your original intentions in the heat of the moment and especially so with oral sex
- You may decide that you only do oral sex with barriers: use a good condom (some of them are flavoured)
- You may decide you are happier not doing oral sex at all because of the low but possible risk.