HIV and Teens: The Transition Into Adulthood

Social and Emotional Growth

Teens deal with several social and emotional issues. One of the most important issues is establishing your identity. Asking "Who am I?" and "How do I fit in the world?" are normal questions. It is a struggle for most teens to feel accepted and create a circle of friends. Developing and maintaining close relationships with peers is made all the more difficult when peer pressure is involved.

Teens are known to take risks and experiment with drugs, alcohol, smoking, sex, and sexuality. Unfortunately, these kinds of risk-taking behaviors can get in the way of your good judgment and quickly worsen your health. If you are drunk or high, you are more likely to have unprotected sex. Unprotected sex may spread your HIV, and may also expose you to other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) such as herpes, hepatitis B or C, or genital warts. STDs can interfere with your HIV disease treatments. There is also the risk of getting infected with another strain of HIV (called "super-infection"), which can cause additional damage to your immune system.

It is important to know that in some states, not disclosing your HIV status before having sex is illegal and you can go to jail (even if you practiced safer sex!). If you are drunk or high, you may forget to tell a sexual partner about your HIV status and may be vulnerable to serious legal consequences.

Even though being HIV+ may make you feel isolated at times, it's important to have open, honest, and supportive friendships. Many HIV+ teens are afraid to tell their friends that they have HIV for fear of rejection or mistreatment. In fact, this can be one of the hardest decisions that an HIV+ teen can make. While telling someone may relieve the burden of keeping such an important secret and may give you the love and support you need from friends, it can also be scary.

Some things to consider before disclosing your HIV status:

• Why do I want to tell this person about my HIV status?
• Will he or she keep my confidence?
• What happens if he or she tells other people?
• What will happen if the relationship is changed by my disclosure?

You can have your health care provider, a parent, a trusted relative, an HIV peer educator, or a friend help you to disclose your status, if you need additional support.

Lastly, high school is all about preparing yourself for adulthood and your future. And your future may seem scary. Questions like "should I go to college?", "will I find love?", "can I get a job?", "will I be able to have children?", or "will I ever have a normal life?" may arise. With the treatments now available, HIV+ people can live very healthy, normal, and long lives.

Support for the HIV+ Teen

Where can you find support? Trusted family members, friends, teachers, counselors, clergy, and health care providers can be a valuable support. Many communities have local HIV support groups, too -- try looking in our local resources directory for some places near you. In a support group, you can talk openly, safely, and confidentially with others who have similar situations and concerns.

There are also some important things that your parents, or guardians, can do to help you:

• Answer questions about sex honestly and accurately.
• Encourage and model a healthy lifestyle, such as good eating habits and exercise.
• Respect your privacy.
• Allow you to handle as much of your care as possible, including setting medical appointments and taking medications; encourage you to be a part of medical decisions.
• Help you set both short term and long term goals that are realistic and achievable.
• Provide lots of love, compassion and patience!

If your parents or guardians are not already doing these things, it is probably because they are learning how to live well with your HIV just like you. Show them this article to help them.