Salt Lake City, UT; Diagnosed in 2003; Four children
I would have to say the hardest thing about being a mother is to allow your children to have their own experiences and not try to shield them from naturally occurring consequences. My youngest son is 22 years old and is going back to jail because he failed a urine analysis on probation, and part of me wants to go to the judge and ask for another chance, but the logical part of me says that he has to learn from his mistakes, even if they make my heart sad. It is hard to see him not take responsibility for the actions that placed him in this situation. He is such a loving person, so it is hard to think about him being stuck in a jail cell for 23 hours a day. But I have to let him grow and learn, no matter how much it hurts me or him.
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The most wonderful part of being a mother is getting to see how some of the best of me is passed on to my children. Things like generosity and kindness. Also the opportunity to watch them grow, change and become amazing people in their own right. The best part of being a mother comes when you get to be a grandmother. You get a chance to do things that you wanted to do differently with your kids with your grandkids. My kids are some of my best friends and we talk almost every day. They are all grown up with kids of their own except my youngest.