Facing the Realities of Fantasy Sex
The Internet allows people to interact with others who share social or sexual interests, or completely reinvent yourself.
Behind your screen name you can bend your gender, talk nasty, check out the action on Web-cam sites, cruise Internet back alleys, download porn, and play out all your sexual fantasies.
Having fantasy sex over the Internet with someone you may never even see in person is called cybersex. And if the Internet doesn't lead to a real-time sexual encounter, it may be the safest safe sex of all.
But cybersex is not without risks and dangers.
Most Avoid AddictionDid you know that there are more than 300,000 adult sites, cybersex sites and chat rooms? According to a well known study, between 80 percent and 90 percent of people who cruise the net for sex don't get hooked. Dr. Al Cooper, a psychologist who teaches at Stanford University, concluded that about 1 percent of the respondents could be classified as true "cybersex compulsives," spending more than 11 hours a week on online sex.
Of 20 million people who visit sex-oriented sites each month, approximately 200,000 people may be using the Internet in a sexually compulsive manner. Women, gay men and other "sexually disenfranchised" groups were particularly at risk for Internet sex addiction.
Researchers found that compulsives have more problems with relationships and jobs than casual visitors of X-rated sites. Research also indicated that 20 percent of men and 12 percent of women use their workplace computer to access online sexual material and that six out of every 100 employees admitted that their work computers were their primary method for accessing online sexual material. According to Robert Weiss, clinical director of the Sexual Recovery Institute in Los Angeles, half of the 125 patients his center treats each week have an Internet component to their compulsive sexual behavior.
It's All in Our HeadsJust what is addiction as it relates to the Internet?
Addiction is more than chemical dependency on drugs and alcohol. It can also be a response to stimulating, pleasure-producing areas of the brain. Our brain circuits are wired so that behaviors needed for our survival, such as eating and sex, are pleasurable. The release of neurotransmitters to the pleasure receptor sites of our brains rewards us. This neuron high can be achieved not only by drugs or alcohol but also by running, meditation, yoga, courting danger, thrill-seeking, or even gambling.
But when it comes to stimulating the brain's pleasure centers, nothing compares to sex. Our sex pleasure circuits serve one of our strongest and most primal needs -- survival of the species! For some people sex can become as compulsive as smoking crack cocaine or using heroin is for others. A generic definition of addiction is a chronic compulsive seeking to engage in a behavior in spite of that behavior leading to life-damaging consequences, including the erosion of self-esteem.
Serious real-world consequences of cybersex can include:
Risk for Infection RisesResults of separate studies found that people who look for sex partners online may be at a higher risk for sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV and AIDS, than those who meet each other in a more conventional way.
Studies also show that people who sought Internet sex were more likely to have other risk factors for getting sexually transmitted disease. For example, they were more likely to have had an STD previously, and they had more partners than people who didn't look for sex online.
A team from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in Atlanta surveyed 856 people who sought HIV testing at the Denver Public Health and Testing Site in Colorado. Nearly one in six said they had logged on to the Web to seek real-time sex partners. Two-thirds of the people in this group had initiated successful sexual contact and one in four had met more than three partners using the Internet.
They also found online sex seekers were more likely to have had a previous STD and had greater numbers of partners than offline clients. Nearly one in three (28.9 percent) of online sex-seekers reported exposure to someone known to be HIV-positive.
A syphilis study conducted in San Francisco reinforced the role of the Internet in sexual risk-taking behavior. While admitting that their findings were not necessarily representative of wider populations, researchers writing in the Journal of the American Medical Association said: "Seeking sex on the Internet may be a potential risk factor for STD/HIV and that these data underscore the need for development of strategies to promote STD/HIV prevention among online seekers."
This is not to imply that there is anything wrong with cybersex. Sex is wonderful, and the Internet is a new fact of modern life. But being aware of the risks and dangers is important.
The Internet allows people to be much more readily consumed by an involvement with sexually explicit materials than they otherwise would be, said David N. Greenfield, head of the Center for Addiction Studies in West Hartford, Conn. If you suspect that you have a problem with Internet sex addiction, a number of avenues are open to you (see "Resources" below).
Recovery from sexual addiction is possible. With help, there's a 70-percent chance of arresting self-destructive behavior.
Sexual Recovery Institute
National Council on Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity
Cybersex Chat Addicts Anonymous
Sexual Addicts Anonymous
Sexual Compulsives Anonymous
Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous
Sexual Recovery Anonymous
Recovering Couples Anonymous
This article was provided by AIDS Project Los Angeles. It is a part of the publication Positive Living.