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Never Be the Same

January 1999

I had fun times! I had dreams!

I had passion -- I had all of these things!

Disco drummin' inside my head.

Strangers comin' in & out of my bed.

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I got a fever (maybe the flu?)

I played with fire and I got burned!

HIV infection was the culprit. I learned.

And I tore at my clothes!

And I screamed out in VAIN!

And I swear I will NEVER be the same!

And I howled at the moon!

And I cried in the rain!

And I swear I will NEVER be the same!

So I went crazy! I didn't care!

Kept on livin' like the virus ain't there.

Don't plan a future -- forget the past!

Livin' in the moment -- makin' the party last!

Then I realized that I needed love.

I met Tracey -- my sweet little dove.

But he was young and unable to cope.

So he got out. All I could do was hope.

And I tore at my clothes!

And I screamed out his NAME!

And I swear! I will NEVER be the same!

And I howled at the moon!

And I cried in the rain!

And I swear! I will NEVER be the same!

So I moved home for a fresh start;

To be near family and mend my broken heart.

I got a new job and proved that I can.

I got promoted and got a health plan.

Health questions asked -- the boss told me to go.

In a small town, talk is cheap! People KNOW!

Told my family of my illness and shame.

Tore me to shreds, but they treat me the same.

And I tore at my clothes!

And I screamed out in PAIN!

And I swear! I will NEVER be the same!

And I howled at the moon!

And I cried in the rain!

And I swear! I will NEVER be the same!

Tracey came back when I despaired.

And restored my hope by showing he cares.

We met some people -- Pam and Arlene.

They run a group on which we can lean.

They said, "See Caltre" (a doctor in town).

She's the angel who sat us right down

And explained to us why she is so sure

That "Cocktail Therapy" is new hope for a cure.

And we'll buy some new clothes!

All of us who REMAIN!

And I swear! We will NEVER be the same!

And we'll dance with the moon!

And we'll laugh at the rain!

And I swear! We will NEVER be the same!

Yes, I swear! We will NEVER be the same!



  
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This article was provided by AIDS Survival Project. It is a part of the publication Survival News.
 
See Also
2013 Poetry Month at TheBody.com: HIV/AIDS-Related Poems From Our Readers
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2012 Poetry Month at TheBody.com
2011 Poetry Month at TheBody.com
2010 Poetry Month at TheBody.com
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