What if my partner says ... ?
"They're not romantic."
"You don't trust me."
"I don't use condoms."
"But we've been having sex without condoms."
"But I love you."
Couples today need to know about HIV and safe sex.
Condoms (rubbers) stop HIV (the virus that causes AIDS).
HIV disease is spread by sex (vaginal, anal or oral) without condoms.
Men can get it from women. Women can get it from men.
You can prevent the spread of HIV. Always use latex condoms.
Remember! Condoms are not 100% perfect. But if you use them properly (see "step by step"), they are very effective.
They're not hard to use, but practice helps! Play with a few. Stretch them to see how strong they are. Practice by yourself and with each other. It's fun for her to put the condom on him!
One way is to bring up the subject with your partner when AIDS is in the news. You can talk about its effect on people having sex, and how more and more people are using condoms.
Or, you can talk about caring for each other and having fun safely.
Or, you can print this out and show it to your partner.
Set your own limits first. Then talk to your partner before you have sex and before you're both hot. Pick a time when you can both relax.
Find condoms you both like. Any latex condom will stop HIV. Try different brands and different kinds (lubricated/dry, ribbed/smooth, etc.) Experiment and have fun.
Step by Step How to Use a Condom |
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The second biggest reason why condoms break is not enough water-based lubrication: use plenty. Birth control foam and jelly give extra protection; they contain the spermicide nonoxynol-9, which kills HIV. |
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NEVER use oil-based lubricants such as vaseline, hand lotion, or massage oil -- they weaken latex and make condoms break.
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Never re-use a condom. Keep extra condoms around so you don't run out. It's okay to keep condoms in your wallet for an evening, but not longer. Body heat damages the condoms over time. |
"Just give me those condoms, and I'll show you how romantic they can be!"
OR
"Worrying about AIDS isn't romantic. With condoms we won't need to worry."
"It's not a matter of trust. It's a matter of health."
OR
"It's important to me that we're both protected."
"I use condoms every time."
OR
"I don't have sex without condoms."
"We can still prevent infection or reinfection."
OR
"I want to start using condoms now so we won't be at any more risk."
"I love you, too. We still need to use condoms."
OR
"Being in love can't protect us against AIDS."
When the penis is hard, squeeze the air from the tip of the condom. This leaves a space for semen.
Hold the tip as you unroll the condom. Make sure there's no air inside. Air bubbles are the biggest reason why condoms break.
After . . . don't lose the condom or spill it. Hold on to the ring at the end of the condom as you withdraw.