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What's Monogamy Got to Do With Marriage?

Study Notes and Anecdotes From LGBT People in Committed, Non-Monogamous Partnerships

June 25, 2013


Kirk Grisham


Can you share an example of findings regarding the ways male couples negotiate HIV risk when it comes to outside partners?

Colleen Hoff, principal investigator of the You & Me Study, at San Francisco State University, actually presented at the 2012 International AIDS Conference about how having sex with outside partners, threesomes, was a way for partners to remind themselves and construct boundaries for their relationships but also to negotiate safer sex, because it often involved a conversation and planning.

A lot of times we see in our couples that they have rules or conditions for relationships: "We can have outside partners but you have to use a condom, or we can have outside partners but there's going to be some sort of positioning rule" -- often it reinforces, in a positive way, risk reduction within the couple; but also helps them think about risk reduction outside of the couple.

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