Memoirs of a Caregiver, Part 3
May 19, 2014
I don't pretend that this story is at all unique. I tell it because I suspect it may be part of a growing trend -- HIVers assuming the role of caregivers where previously they thought of themselves as recipients of care. It's a bit of an adjustment.
An Ill Partner, an Ailing Pet: When the Tables Are Turned
April 8, 2014
Last time I wrote on this topic I expressed the thought that with many HIVers now living long and productive lives they would increasingly be required to be caregivers rather than recipients of care. My partner is undergoing treatment for prostate cancer, after all. and while the prognosis is pretty good, the balance of who needs help in our relationship, physical and emotional, and who doesn't, has shifted.
Both Sides Now: Caring for an HIV-Negative Partner
March 16, 2014
I've never really been a high-maintenance patient myself. Only the odd hospital stay here and there, the odd bouts of depression and anxiety which have largely dissipated as the years dragged on since my diagnosis in 1993. I've put on a brave face since day one. No practical things I couldn't do myself either -- although that's not to say I haven't played the patient card on occasion. No more cleaning of fish tanks for me, no dealing with kitty litter, for instance but that was more because I disliked doing these chores rather than any perceived health hazard, but better to be safe than sorry, right? *wink wink*
Hooked Up: Exploring HIV Disclosure Online
September 28, 2013
Some hook-up sites for gay men make it easy to discuss HIV status; others just muddy the waters. But how reliable is the data for deciding what sex to have, with whom and how safely? And how does barebacking fit in? Bob Leahy looks at two popular sites and arrives at some surprising conclusions.
Why We Need to Re-Assess Barebacking, Stop the Stigma and Be Honest About the Risk
June 17, 2013
As editor of a respected online magazine for people living with HIV, I made a choice, rightly or wrongly (probably the latter), so that in our magazine's first year or two we didn't cover barebacking. We thought it was too inflammatory a subject, thought it might encourage people to do it, thought that people would think we were irresponsible.
Changing My Mind on Treatment as Prevention
April 12, 2013
One hundred and eighty degree turns happen in a variety of ways. Sometimes we seize the steering wheel of our lives and in one fell swoop travel along an opposite path. Other times, we take the turn slowly, one degree at a time, gradually realizing the path we are on leads nowhere and we need to go off in radically new directions. That's been the case with my realizing that most of my once fervently held objections to treatment as prevention, in 2013, make much less sense than they once did.
Tell All: Fresh Thoughts on Disclosure
February 15, 2013
In these times when the conversation is all about NON-disclosure, I'm becoming increasingly a fan of the very opposite. In short, I think many more people need to disclose.
Gay/Bi Men Hung Out to Dry in HIV Research?
November 6, 2012
The place of gay/bi men in our response to the HIV epidemic has changed. (And I say "gay/bi men" because I dislike seeing the term MSM -- men who have sex with men -- outside the realm of epidemiology.) Once, in those early days of the epidemic, we were both leaders and the focus of everything about HIV. But over time, and as other at-risk groups became more affected by the disease, that all changed. It had to.
July 19, 2012
I've never really heard people ask this question -- strange in itself when it looks like every question about HIV has been asked, and written about, often -- whether people living with HIV are inherently different. I'm talking about more prone to taking risks and thus more susceptible to becoming infected. Sure, we know all about vulnerable populations, social determinants of health and all that, which are often fingered as the culprits in HIV infections. But let's face it; the reality is that many, many people from vulnerable populations and with ALL the social determinants of health looking pretty good DON'T get infected. So what is different about the ones who do?
Turning a Blind Eye to Smoking No Longer
June 7, 2012
It's time, I'm afraid, to turn a critical gaze on those with HIV who smoke -- but more importantly those service providers who ignore that life-threatening issue. Because where we are now as a community on this issue, a community who should be leaders in promoting healthy choices is, frankly, third-rate.
A banker turned AIDS activist, Bob Leahy is the busy Editor of PositiveLite.com, Canada's globally read online HIV magazine by and for people living with HIV. Diagnosed with HIV in 1993, Bob has held almost every volunteer position in the HIV community imaginable, including chairing his local ASO and serving on the boards of the Ontario HIV Treatment Network and the Canadian AIDS Society. Recognized on the Ontario AIDS Network's prestigious Honour Roll, his interests lie in social media, gay men's sexual health and making HIV research intelligible for all. A long-time blogger, this ex-Torontonian lives the rural life with his three dogs and partner of thirty-one years.
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May 19, 2014 - Memoirs of a Caregiver, Part 3: A Blog Entry by Bob Leahy
April 8, 2014 - An Ill Partner, an Ailing Pet: When the Tables Are Turned -- A Blog Entry by Bob Leahy
March 16, 2014 - Both Sides Now: Caring for an HIV-Negative Partner -- A Blog Entry by Bob Leahy
September 28, 2013 - Hooked Up: Exploring HIV Disclosure Online: A Blog Entry by Bob Leahy
June 17, 2013 - Why We Need to Re-Assess Barebacking, Stop the Stigma and Be Honest About the Risk: A Blog Entry by Bob Leahy
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