Dave R.

HIV and Neuropathy: How to Avoid Becoming a Nervous Wreck

Self-Protection Against Cyber Haters and Other Bullies
September 16, 2012

I think many people react quite understandably and sensibly to cyber hate mail by trying to show the bully up as immature and antisocial. However, if the bully thinks he or she has been seen through, that serves to inflame their hatred in a sort of reverse psychology and the situation can become worse. This occasionally leads to what's known as cyber stalking. This most often applies to public figures and celebrities but many HIV-positive people have been the victims of hate campaigns and continued pestering. The bully can apparently find ways to recruit others to his/her cause and uses technology to track the victim's every Internet movement. This can be very alarming, especially if you feel you're being watched at all times -- a classic symptom of being stalked. Upsetting cases have led to exposure in the victim's work environment, as rumors and half truths are spread amongst unwitting colleagues at work. Once in the open, as we all know, Pandora's Box can never be closed. In the end, no reaction at all to the original tweet or comment may be the safest option, however angry or upset you may feel.

140 Ways to Hate ... Just One to Despair
September 16, 2012

One of the few advantages of getting old is knowing that you really don't have to put up with other people's crap anymore. That said, the first hate mail that hit my inbox shocked me more than I expected. I almost gave up blogging there and then; the hurt was both unexpected and unjust and I had to take several breaths and remind myself that this happens millions of times a day across the world. Then I wondered why people feel the need to vent their hatred on the Internet and what could be done about it.

Dem Bones, Dem Bones, Dem Dry Bones
August 31, 2012

You know whatever they say about 50 being the new 40 and 60 being the new 50, well that's all fine and dandy for the super-fit, senior gym bunny, but if you're HIV positive it can be a very different matter, or at least in my case! From my point of view, 50 was the new 60 and 60 was the new 70 and now every new birthday seems to increase in dog years.

Polari: The Lost Language of Rainbows
August 3, 2012

Dave R.

People have to find the happy medium between passive respect for the doctor and yelling at him or her because you don't hear what you want to hear. We also all need to make adjustments in our approaches and learn to use the wealth of new information available in such a way that a consultation with a doctor becomes a constructive and rewarding process for both sides.

I often find myself having conflicting feelings about doctors. I've got several specialists, who take care of various complaints both pre and post-HIV and a home doctor who deals with every-day ailments and tries to keep an eye on the big picture too. Sometimes I'm enormously grateful that I live in a country where that's possible and where I don't have to pay extra for any basic medical services. Other times, I seethe with frustration at mistakes, or wrong diagnoses, or misguided treatments.

It's hard to estimate the impact of the latest news to hit the neuropathy forums (what! we can't have trending stories too?) but anyone who has recently Googled the words HIV and Neuropathy has been confronted by dozens of links referring to the news that Lyrica (or pregabalin) is pretty much useless for treating neuropathic pain. It's not often that the internet neuropathy community (normally a mild-mannered, stoical, too-busy-dealing-with-symptoms folk) spreads a story so quickly across their websites, blogs, forums and chat rooms and when it happens, it's for a good reason!

Poorer regions of the world have never been given so much money and support to combat the spread of HIV as during the last ten years, yet despite massive financial back-up for health initiatives, HIV prevalence and rates of infection are increasing in those areas and not shrinking! As a result, while the epidemic is weaker in terms of global statistics; it is expanding and intensifying in specific areas.

For those who partied in the '70s and '80s, the name Donna Summer evokes nostalgic memories of hot discos throbbing to the heat generated by 'I Feel Love', 'Love to Love You Baby', 'Hot Stuff' and Last Dance', to name but a few. This woman put sex and disco together and instigated a musical genre, which belonged to gays and was only later adopted by the world at large. She was the musical 'love-child' of Georgio Moroder and Pete Bellotte and was the voice that fronted a new techno-synth and electronic sound that was distinctly European in flavour and first broke there too in the early '70s. The icing on the 'Macarthur Park' cake went into meltdown however, when in 1983, La Summer opened her newly converted Christian mouth and made some remarks, which instantly alienated the gay community and thus her strongest fan base. Whether the things she said were misquoted or not, suspicions were aroused which refuse to go away.

"Dear Dave ...": The Virus Writes Back!
April 29, 2012

Are you surprised? Seriously! How can you be surprised? You knew all about me before we met and let me remind you ... you knew what to expect! How many friends had I killed, with you watching me do it and yet still determined to get into bed with me eventually? Oh please, don't tell me you never meant for this to happen! You pretty much knew how to avoid it, or am I wrong?

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