Sorry we have to meet this way. I know what you mean about the support groups, I live in Boston, and most of the women were struggling w/ drugs, housing, and child custody, while I had just finished college, started a new job, and was raising my 3 year old alone.
But I continued to go, and actually got close to these women...because of the "thing" that bonded us. But I always felt as though, I wish there was someone I could talk to on a level more related to my own.
You know its weird, one day in school (the day I was getting my results...no kidding) we had this silly little contest in class (I forget what it was), but I won!! Oh how great....even though inside I was still dying because I was fearing my results (I was really preping myself for the inevidable)..do you know what I won!!! I won a WILLMAKER (software program). It just confirmed the answer that I was going to get.
I know it feels as though you are disapointing your family, after all the great things you have done, and it sounds like you are very close to them. That is going to make the rest of your life much more special. I am from a big family too. You really begin to appreciate "time" differently. I was diagnosed in 95, and had a pretty low tcell count to start, but that was 10 yrs ago, and my tcells are super, and my viral load remains low...even taking a break from meds (which you never think you will see the day), but I took them for 8 of the 10 years....
Life will get easier, and you will meet someone like you (I have to say...maybe not brand new mercedes like you, just kidding), but what is so super and so special about you, is that, you are someone who not only appreciates who you have in your life...you appreciate how hard it was to get where you are, and work hard for it).
You will have your happyness, and then some. don't fear your job, especially so soon. There are alot of professional working women w/ hiv, you'd be surprized, its just usually not known....because they fear people finding out...like you. I work w/ people with hiv...and I've even shocked myself meeting some patients come in, with "who" they are and "what" they do. And I always think to myself (because I know), they must have a hard time finding others to connect to. Especially with hiv....you are desperate to feel like you are not alone.
You are not alone.