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HIV Life >> I Just Tested Positive

ruralguy
Regular

Reged: 07/08/09
Posts: 27
found out june 24, first test results next week
      07/11/09 09:32 AM

I found out in the course of a normal annual physical exam. Everything was fine and then I got an HIV positive result on June 24. I saw a specialist on July 3 and I get my first test results next week on the 16th. I'm 56 and I just be totally overwhelmed by this. Crying without warning, anxiety attacks, little interest in food. I'm feeling deeply ashamed and embarassed. I live in a pretty small town that is ok w/gay people but I don't think they can handle this. My husband/partner/best friend of 26 years has been great and I've told our one other sex partner (so far both are negative). Ovr the July 4th holidays we had lots of family around and everyone could tell I was "not ok" but I couldn't talk to anyone about it....I still know almost nothing. I just had to go of and be alone and cry more then return and try to act normal. I'm feeling very lost and afraid and find it hard to focus on anything. Luckily I'm a runner and still doing my 3 miles every few days - it seems an ok way to clear my brain for a short time anyway. And when I need it ambien helps me sleep. I'm hugely worried about test results next week. My prior hiv test (the last negative one) was 18 months before. Anyone out there like me? Being in a rural place is hard and I could use some people to email with.

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Subject Posted by Posted on
* found out june 24, first test results next week ruralguy 07/11/09 09:32 AM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week coffee   07/20/09 02:55 PM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week ruralguy   07/16/09 05:17 PM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next wee tomamtz   07/15/09 10:09 AM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week fellis   07/14/09 07:18 AM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week ruralguy   07/14/09 03:38 PM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week Robert1   07/14/09 07:53 PM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week dfwjeep   07/13/09 10:20 PM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week bnagayguy   07/13/09 10:15 PM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week Hans   07/14/09 04:56 AM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week mountainman   07/13/09 07:56 PM
. * Re: found out june 24, first test results next week Jackie__Blue   07/11/09 03:06 PM

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