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movingon
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Reged: 08/27/07
Posts: 66
feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds
      09/03/07 04:16 AM

Its been 4 weeks since i got the worst phone call of my life, and i have had 2 weeks of knowing what my initial CD4 and v/l is, 284 and 98,000. How come i still feel strong ? i haven't even had a cold. I hit the gym EVERY day and have been eating very healthy. I have totally 100% stopped smoking and only drink the occasional glass of red wine. I dont take drugs, well not anymore anyway, and i honestly feel like i could go outside right now and run 10Ks . I am finding it very hard to accept that i have a "chronic but managable illness" when i dont even feel sick, infact i feel as fit as i have ever felt. However, with my CD 4 as it is, and my high viral load , i am having to face the possiblity of starting medication pretty soon. Will these make me feel shit ? Will they diminish my energy levels so i cant hit the gym ?. Will my physique change ? I'm 6ft 4 and 228 pounds, in decent shape. Strong as an ox. I am so so so scared, even though i do know that meds can help me live a long healthy life, its still feels like i am doomed and will get worse over time. Will the fact that i have drank alcohol and smoked pot for 10 years reduce my chances ? Even though i remianed fit during these years ? I mean, i was only doing what my rugby playing mates were all doing !!!!

I am living on water, chinese tea, flax seeds , cereal, skimmed milk and well cooked lean mates, loads of vedgetables, tofu, brown rice and basically no fat. Does this give me a chance ?

Help me , please !

Post Extras: Remind Me!     Notify Moderator

Entire thread
Subject Posted by Posted on
* feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds movingon 09/03/07 04:16 AM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds GregGriffin   09/18/07 05:53 AM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds vokz   09/06/07 05:42 AM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds movingon   09/18/07 10:15 PM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds movingon   09/06/07 11:13 PM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds Survivor   09/03/07 10:50 AM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds alive4216years   09/03/07 07:10 PM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds chrisbadmushroom   09/03/07 01:13 PM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds movingon   09/03/07 11:02 PM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds Survivor   09/04/07 12:03 AM
. * Re: feeling insecure, scared and terrified of meds orange01   09/04/07 06:07 PM

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