I don't think anyone is trying to say that you are unique and the only person who has not disclosed to a partner. I think they are just trying to help you realize that a love relationship cannot stand when there is an omission of this magnitude. Not only is it bad for the relationship, but if this is someone who you truly love, then you also respect them completely and would want them to know the truth so that they can decide for themselves what future they want with you.
If this woman loves you, the HIV would not make you unattractive to her. The dishonesty, however, would be quite devastating, and is not something that helps build a foundation on which a future can be built upon.
This woman that you love is changing her life to be with you. Relocating and changing jobs is not a small task. You should be honest with her about this. This is not a personal attack, or saying that you are the only one that has not disclosed to a potential life-partner. But, I have heard of others make this mistake and the results were hard for both parties (you can find them here on these forums). Don't make that same mistake.
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