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Family and Friends >> My Loved One Has HIV/AIDS

Carrie
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Reged: 11/11/07
Posts: 58
Tis' the season for... family conflict
      12/07/07 02:57 AM

Most of you know my story in the few short weeks I've been on this board. I've been given great advise and harsh advise. I've been critisized and cared for. Knowing all of that and appriciating it all, I have another question.

My whole family knows about my boyfriend being a drug addict who's trying to recover. (I am also in recovery from drugs) But only my Mom and Dad know about his HIV positive status. Well on Thanksgiving, my Brother and Sister-in-law told me, "We will not expose our children to you or him, so we will not be joining the family for Thanksgiving". It made him and I feel so uncomfortable that we were unable to go join the family, letting my Brother and Sister-in-law participate in Thanksgiving instead.

Well Christmas Eve is going to be at my Brother and Sister-in-laws house. My boyfriend and I had a good talk about everything, and I told my Sister-in-law and my Mom that him and I want to put everything aside for the holidays so that the family could all be together. My Mom came back and said that it would be best for him and I not to join the family on Christmas Eve, and rather join them on Christmas Day when my Brother and Sister-in-law would not be there. I asked my Mom if it would be ok if just my daughter went to join the family on Christmas Eve so that she wouldn't be affected as much by the situation.

I know it's not a huge deal to miss out on part of the holiday while still going to the other part, but I'm still offended.

I truly understand my familys concern about him, but they won't seem to even give him a chance. My parents met him briefly a few weeks ago and things seemed to go alright in my eyes. He was a bit upset with me that I told my parents about him being positive, saying that it wasn't my place to tell them something like that, and said that he thinks they will look at him differantly now. I explained that it was just my parents who I told and that I tell my parents almost everything. I told him I was sorry and that since I'm negative, I don't understand all of his views when it comes to his status. We left it at that.

Anyways, I'm a bit peeved at the whole situation of being told that I'm not invited to Christmas Eve because of my boyfriend who I love very much. I'm wondering if anyone else has had an experience where they have not been invited to a family gathering either because of their, or their loved ones HIV status?

Like I said before, I truly do understand that my family is just looking out for their best intrest of me and my daughter because of him struggeling in recovery (he's been sober for over a month now, which is a HUGE accomplishment!!!), but I feel they are just trying to push us away from the family rather than try to get to know him. I'm also scared that once the rest of my family finds out about his HIV status that they are going to truly loose it.

Please help me out. Thank you very much.

Post Extras: Remind Me!     Notify Moderator

Entire thread
Subject Posted by Posted on
* Tis' the season for... family conflict Carrie 12/07/07 02:57 AM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict TRex   12/28/07 09:15 PM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict Carrie   01/03/08 12:08 AM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict whocanfigure   01/03/08 08:45 PM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict Bear60   12/09/07 02:53 PM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict Carrie   12/09/07 11:07 PM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict Bear60   12/12/07 05:10 PM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict Carrie   12/13/07 12:42 AM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict Florida69   12/07/07 09:33 AM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict Carrie   12/07/07 12:44 PM
. * Re: Tis' the season for... family conflict franfrog   12/07/07 01:57 PM

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