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Reged: 04/12/07
Posts: 2
Intimacy with positive partner
      04/12/07 10:51 PM

Hi and thanks for taking the time to read my question. I am female and hiv negative and in a relationship with a wonderful man who is hiv positive. we have been together 6 months. I care about him very deeply, but I have had great difficulty coming to terms with the HIV. I think about it almost constantly, spend evening after evening browsing the internet for information which I have already read over and over again, and I can't bring myself to have a physical relationship with him, even though I love him. I feel really bad for not being able to overcome these feelings, and I have had counselling with a local hiv charity to help me work through it, but it hasn't really helped. I wish I could feel differently about sex with him, but I think it would be wrong for me to have sex with him when I don't feel comfortable about it. I also spend day after day worrying about the future and how HIV may affect us. He doesn't seem to feel the same way I do, but is very positive-minded and gets on with his life without giving it too much thought. Because he seems so fine, I don't really want to burden him with all my worries when maybe the best thing for him is not to dwell on HIV, but to get on with living his life (he's in perfect health). My question is 1), has anyone else been in this situation and found a way around it, and 2) what do I do about being upable to give him a sexual relationship? With previous partners, whose status I didn't know, I used condoms, but on numerous occasions they broke or came off despite our best efforts. I can't overcome the fear that if this happens with him I could become infected. Would it be fairer of me to end the relationship (rather than leave the burden of that decision with him) so that he could find someone who could give him a full relationship?
Thank you in advance for any advice you may have.
I wish all readers the best in their own lives.


Post Extras: Remind Me!     Notify Moderator

Entire thread
Subject Posted by Posted on
* Intimacy with positive partner jcc 04/12/07 10:51 PM
. * Re: Intimacy with positive partner crepuscular   12/07/07 02:01 PM
. * Re: Intimacy with positive partner dengirl   04/22/07 11:12 AM
. * Re: Intimacy with positive partner july30   07/31/07 12:14 PM
. * Re: Intimacy with positive partner franfrog   04/12/07 11:58 PM
. * Re: Intimacy with positive partner jcc   04/13/07 06:54 AM
. * Re: Intimacy with positive partner franfrog   04/13/07 11:40 AM

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