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HIV Life >> Living With HIV

Yeary
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Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight
      03/01/06 11:29 PM

Hi Eric--
How long have you been clean or sober or clean and sober?
I am feeling pretty bad to have lived the way I've lived. I have alot of shame and guilt and I know I just gave up. when the doc told me my numbers wouldn't come up from 35 with a new diagnosis of hep b and hep c, I crashed and hard. I ran from the reality of being at deaths door. It was hard to hear the numbers, the scariest is that I have thrush again. My first symptom in 22 years of being positive was eshogaul {spelling} thrush and hiv went into all my intestines, my central nervous system, my brain and so I became violently ill, at first I actually had forgot about hiv, i really just thought I had the flu. Then fevers, night sweats, vomiting, diarhea, and oh my God. I turned into a human skeleton. I threw away 5 years sobriety. Now, since I didn't die, and I'm gaining some weight I think I am ready to deal with this illness and no more drugs. I don't really know if I get to live or not, I know what time I have left I got to try. I don't know if the promises are for me yet I can try, can't I. I'm still in treatment however we have a library here, meetings, {computer in a day room] movie night, they allowed me special visit from some positive friends from a support group I went to. I don't know what pm means about getting you to be a sponsor. Could we correspond by mail?
I can give you my address also.



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Subject Posted by Posted on
* CD4 count at 8--gained weight Yeary 02/28/06 11:30 PM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight ScotCharles   03/02/06 12:17 PM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight rain05   02/28/06 11:57 PM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight Anonymous   03/01/06 11:34 PM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight Survivor   03/01/06 12:55 AM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight Yeary   03/01/06 11:29 PM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight Survivor   03/02/06 12:01 AM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight Demar   03/01/06 03:00 AM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight Anonymous   03/01/06 11:36 PM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight franfrog   03/01/06 07:57 AM
. * Post deleted by Becky AIDS2HIV   03/01/06 08:54 AM
. * Post deleted by Becky AIDS2HIV   03/01/06 08:56 AM
. * Re: CD4 count at 8--gained weight franfrog   03/01/06 09:03 AM

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