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HIV Life >> Living With HIV

Anonymous
Unregistered

SEROCONVERTED
      08/03/04 02:49 AM

I recently was infected over the 4th weekend. I had 2 one night stands - both girls pursued me and I had unprotected sex. I just know the 1st girl was the one who murdered me (well murder/suicide is the more accurate depiction). She looked sick in retrospect, had vaginal fluids as wet as the ocean, and we had sex for hours - she also made comments which made me believe she knew she had something the next morning which haunt me like a nightmare.

I took viagra since we had been at a club most of the night drinking - ironic if the viagra caused me to be exposed long enough to the vaginal fluids to infect me. The thing is I didn't even like her and turned her down and she asked again to come to my room! I'm just a man and find it awkward to turn down a woman asking me for sex. Ugh! The mistake of the century! In my reckless abandon I used the "pull-out" method.

4 days later I had maculo-papulor rash in the genitial area, sore throat, dry cough, fatugue, and high fever. A couple of weeks later the sore throat came back with transient rash. No mistaking these cursed symptoms - acute HIV syndrome. Healthy, handsome, and vibrant one moment - dead man walking the next!

Of course I'm in shock, angry at her for not insisting I wear a condom and angry at myself for not protecting myself - 32 years old making tons of money and looking to settle down and raise a family. Now I can't have children and am HIV positive! I'm fucked. I wish I could meet a woman around my age and infection time who could accept me and build a life together. I feel so guilty even of thinking of marrying someone who is not positive. What a lonely feeling.
Life just got a whole hell of a lot more complicated!




Post Extras: Remind Me!     Notify Moderator

Entire thread
Subject Posted by Posted on
* SEROCONVERTED Anonymous 08/03/04 02:49 AM
. * Re: SEROCONVERTED Anonymous   08/03/04 11:04 AM
. * Re: SEROCONVERTED Anonymous   08/03/04 09:55 AM
. * Re: SEROCONVERTED Too tired   08/03/04 04:15 AM
. * Re: SEROCONVERTED Anonymous   08/03/04 06:00 AM
. * Re: SEROCONVERTED Anonymous   08/15/04 04:48 PM
. * Re: SEROCONVERTED too tired   08/03/04 08:35 AM
. * Re: SEROCONVERTED Anonymous   08/03/04 11:06 AM

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