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madctygurl
Newbie

Reged: 02/11/12
Posts: 1
3 years later - will I be alone forever?
      #261096 - 02/11/12 12:16 AM

Hello everyone. It has been a few years since I visited here. I thought everything was going ok, but I guess not. The man I was dating when I found out my HIV status is still "with" me, if you can call it that. We have gotten in a few fights and he will say he risks his life being with me, and he is right. We have completely lost our emotional connection, and I feel so very alone.

I swear, sometimes I really wish I hadn't gotten tested...does anybody else ever feel that way, or am I crazy?

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riverprincessModerator
Moderator

Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1742
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: 3 years later - will I be alone forever? new
      #261101 - 02/11/12 08:33 AM

Don't let some idiot guy make you feel that way. Too bad he wasn't truthful with himself in the beginning, but perhaps he thought he could. Just wish him well and move on. There are sooo many guys looking for women . Just focus on yourself as a person and the rest will fall into place.

--------------------
Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

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nanma3
Newbie

Reged: 01/23/12
Posts: 4
Loc: Michigan
Re: 3 years later - will I be alone forever? new
      #261139 - 02/13/12 06:29 PM

I felt that way for a very long time. I got to the point that I quit dating because of the issue of having to tell someone about your status, Even though we wish sometimes that we didn't get tested cause it seems life would be easier, but in the long run it is better knowing and being able to do things to live a happy and healthy life. I was in a situation similar to yours and I found that I could not stay in it cause I did not need the extra stress of his fears. It's not fair of him to keep telling you that he is risking his life to be with you. Because in all actualty as long as you are having safe sex being with you isn't risking his life. I raised my girls and they never became hiv+. There are many relationships where the partner that isn't infected never does. You just need to accept who you are and what you are and learn to know what you deserve out of life, I isolated myself for nine years because of the fear of rejection, but I am taking that step and ready to look for love. So no, you won't be alone forever and you are not alone.

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RobertSF
Newbie

Reged: 07/09/10
Posts: 4
Re: 3 years later - will I be alone forever? new
      #261155 - 02/14/12 05:33 PM

Hello, I am a male who was diagnosed with F.B.A. Since 1998. My partner just recently passed away in my arms as he was struggling with his own medical conditions. He was absolutely free of HIV/AIDS. We were together for 13 years but he accepted me as I was and I did the same. You see when two people fall in love with each other it should not really matter what comes with the package. Education, playing responsibly and safe is the key issues. We had a life full of ups and downs but not once did my condition come up. I miss him very much for he was my anchor and rock but my life is still moving forward but I have to be strong. This was the person that I planned to be with until I died but the roles became reversed. So keep your head up high and walk proud because you are a being and person whom is worth the time and effort.

If you are still with your BF tell him to grow up and read a book. If this is not up to his ability then I would ask him to leave for you must protect yourself for your well being and health.

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riverprincessModerator
Moderator

Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1742
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: 3 years later - will I be alone forever? new
      #261234 - 02/18/12 08:36 AM

My condolences to you on the passing of your partner. It's never easy and when it goes in a way we don't anticipate it just seems to make it harder. From being pos for 20 years, with spouse for 38 and now living in an adult community , I've come to the conclusion that in a relationship it is by Gods design that one ends up being the care taker of the other. And in a strange way that is actually a privilage to be given that responsibility . I say privilage because it is usually based on a deep love that gives inner strength. And it reminds me that when we feel our weakest is when Gods strength within us is carrying us .

--------------------
Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

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