Advertisement
The Body: The Complete HIV/AIDS Resource
Follow Us Follow Us on Facebook Follow Us on Twitter Download Our App
Professionals >> Visit The Body PROThe Body en Espanol

HIV Life >> I Just Tested Positive

Pages: 1 | 2 | (show all)
rsmithson
Newbie

Reged: 07/31/13
Posts: 12
Ok I am going CRAZY!!!!
      #273235 - 08/01/13 12:29 AM

So I got bad news today and I am not sure how I feel about it and it is not that I am positive. I am a good guy, I did my homework was the section leader for 4 years in school. Then I came out. Oh the back lash at first... but 15 years later so much support. Now flash forward.... 6/22/2013 I started coughing and running a fever. I called out of work on a double.... Fever cough white film in mouth. I pushed through feeling like crap. I was coughing so hard I did not keep anything down. At work Friday 6/28 I threw up and was sent home. I slept ALL day and woke up with a 102.9 fever and immediately went to the doctor. She examined me and said with the thrush and pneumonia she wanted to do an HIV test. I was ok with that. The OraQuick test had a negative result. Cool! She was not satisfied and gave me the ELISA that tested reactive. She ordered the Western Blot. It came back, mind you I had to call and get the results they did not let me know if it was in, it was indeterminate. Come back in 3 months. I knew if I had waited I could have ended up like some of my friends either laying in a hospital bed or not caring. I went on 7/3 to our local organization. They do free testing and I had the results from all my tests. I showed it to them and they did OraSure test that tested negative. They sent me to the health department for the fourth generation. I took on Friday they did the results and ON 7/10 I WAS OFFICIALLY DIAGNOSED. It was originally so hard to accept. I set up all the appointments. I was ok until I did labs and had to get in front of needles. and all the blood. We set the appointment, I had just finished antibiotics and I have been feeling fantastic. Everyone agreed I was seroconverting. So I go and research thinking my CD4 level was going to be low because of those infections, I was guessing 350-500. 7/31 24 years on the anniversaryof my dad's death, I get my CD4 counts. My mom and stepdad are in the room and I am telling all the stuff that had been going on, She asks all the questions and said we need to get these numbers up. I was like yes we do, and then she dropped the ball.... My CD4 came back at 5. I freak and mom is breaking down and I am still not right. How can you go from life is great you are negative and a month and two days they tell me I am classified as AIDS. I am floored. I have read and this is rare, but I just got out of a 7 year relationship and was tested every 3 months the old way with blood. So this has gone on in the last year since we broke up.... There are 3 it could be.... One was positive, but I was the top but as we kissed we moved to quick and his tooth hit my gum causing me to bleed. Another is a married man and it was an online thing and he posted dates and his neg status.... then there is the third online and young and no status, but I always ask. Well he hesitated then yeah. So I am fighting and have not been diagnosed very long. I am on Anti Fungal and Bactrim. I go back Monday for more test and one day I wanna look back on this and realize how strong I am . I feel so weak right now. But my spirit is strong. I plan on being tobacco free in next week... but realistically I say a month. Please anyone that something similar has happened to Please tell me your story and give me strength that you did it and its possible. I should not have done so much research because I am so scared that I might not pull through. I am defenseless and I have a mom and sibling that needs me...

--------------------
7/31 CD4- 5 VL 410,000
8/19 started ART

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
riverprincessModerator
Moderator

Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1808
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273244 - 08/01/13 07:26 PM

Well smithson sure sounds like you got blindside for sure. I can't say why the timing went as it did . Where does your last encounter fit into the time line? At this point all that matters really is how your going to take care of your health from this time and forward. Having sincle didgets isn't the greatest but it's not the worse either. When I was offocially tested 20 years ago , not only did I have an opportunistic that put me in the hospital but I too was into the single diget catagory. Aand I'm still here with numbers into the 700's. It's always a shock at first no matter what the numbers are. But rest assured that you'll be around for your mom and siblings. And actually be thankful that you began feeling sick enough to go seek a doctors help. I've been on meds for over 18 yrs now. I too was classified as " AIDS ". Yeah it scares the crap outta ya but just do as I did , changed my panties and moved forward.

--------------------
Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
lilfshrmn
Member

Reged: 03/07/13
Posts: 49
Loc: SE US
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273248 - 08/01/13 07:44 PM

Similar experience here. CD4 nadir 11 with thrush and severe lung infection. Started HARRT(Atripla) in November and have rebounded to CD4 of 121, VL less than 20. Numerous side effects but better than where I started (I really thought I was dying, so did my doctors.)
Breath, take the meds and talk to others. This is an excellent resource for educating yourself and connect to others.
You are not alone, my friend. We were all scared crazy at first. Family support essential. Keep track of your meds, symptoms, diet, and doctor visits. If your strain is not drug resistant you'll start feeling better in no time. Feel free to PM me if you need to vent...

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Ninjawife
Newbie

Reged: 07/29/13
Posts: 20
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273250 - 08/01/13 10:59 PM

You aren't going crazy, you are feeling the same shock that my husband and I felt six weeks ago when we were diagnosed. His story is similar to yours in that he was feeling sick and I dragged him to the doctor. He got so ill he couldn't walk, talk, feed himself, etc. Our PCP didn't think he was going to make it through either, he was just too weak. Once the meds started kicking in, however, I started seeing a difference in him every time I visited his hospital room (every morning before work and every evening after work). He's gotten so much better that he is coming home tomorrow.

It will take time, but you are on the right track to getting healthy again. I've done a bunch of research and everything I've found says that CD4 counts come back as the viral load comes down. My count is fairly low as well, although I don't feel sick, but I'm starting meds tomorrow and they will be back to normal by Christmas.

I know what you are feeling, I've been feeling it myself. But a few deep breaths and you will start to realize that you can get through this too. Your mom and siblings need you, and you need them as well. Hold tight to your family, they will get you through this.

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
rsmithson
Newbie

Reged: 07/31/13
Posts: 12
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273253 - 08/02/13 02:39 AM

Yeah I was floored. I mean I tested Negative in March and it scared me. She really thought I was. I actually slept with 2 someones 2 weeks after being tested negative. Having narrowed it down, its ok. I think that the pneumonia that I had an antibiotic for that I could not afford to fill was finished on the Monday before my blood work. I think that when they retest that I will be ok. I feel healthy, today I have eaten 2 full meals twice. I am starting to eat fruits and veggies and peanuts and be the healthiest in my life.

--------------------
7/31 CD4- 5 VL 410,000
8/19 started ART

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
riverprincessModerator
Moderator

Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1808
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273269 - 08/02/13 06:50 PM

Well my friend , time to pick yourself up off the floor. lolYeah it sucks having the breath knocked outof ya but once you brush off your knees and take a deep breath, straighten out your rumpled clothes and comb your hair back into place you will see that the world is still going around as always. There will be that frazzled stage of trying to figure things out, drs appts, bloodwoork and such but when the dust clears you will resume a life routine again. It will be familiar yet different in aweird way . Just keep moving forward my friend , Keep moving forward.

--------------------
Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
riverprincessModerator
Moderator

Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1808
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273270 - 08/02/13 06:53 PM


Well my friend , time to pick yourself up off the floor. lolYeah it sucks having the breath knocked outof ya but once you brush off your knees and take a deep breath, straighten out your rumpled clothes and comb your hair back into place you will see that the world is still going around as always. There will be that frazzled stage of trying to figure things out, drs appts, bloodwoork and such but when the dust clears you will resume a life routine again. It will be familiar yet different in aweird way . Just keep moving forward my friend , Keep moving forward.

--------------------


--------------------
Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
new2this2010
Expert

Reged: 06/22/10
Posts: 119
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273760 - 09/05/13 02:33 PM

With a CD4 count of 5 and an AIDS diagnosis, it's impossible for your CD4 counts to ever return to normal. I know this sounds negative and pessimistic but you need to hear the truth. You'll be lucky if it goes to 350-500 range and stays there. Your viral load will eventually be undetectable but the real problem for you will be your CD4 count. This is what fights off infection. You will have complications and such so just be prepared. It doesn't mean you're gonna die but you your CD4 count will never recover from dropping that low. You were diagnosed with AIDS really fast. I've never heard f going from a negative test to a CD4 count of 5 to an AIDS diagnosis in such a short period of time. It appears that the virus has advanced really fast in your system and has done a LOT OF DAMAGE to your immune system. You are also at risk of IRIS.

http://www.aidsmap.com/Starting-HAART-with-a-CD4-cell-count-below-100-cellsmmsup3sup-a-risk-factor-for-IRIS-study-finds/page/1420306/

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
notinterested
All Star

Reged: 09/07/11
Posts: 127
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273772 - 09/05/13 11:36 PM

I never do this but I'm going too now, SHAME ON YOU new2this. Please do US ALL a favor or at least me and leave this site. Someone newly diagnosed comes to this site in need of support and YOU post that crap. Your probably a very bitter person who is taking your anger at your sad life on someone who is vulnerable. Get a life, see a therapist and please never come back to this site !!!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
notinterested
All Star

Reged: 09/07/11
Posts: 127
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273774 - 09/05/13 11:52 PM

Hi rsmith, I just wanted to send you a quick post to tell you not to worry and things will be ok. There are some wonderful stories out there of survival and people getting back to normalcy. Riverprincess has one of those stories and many others. Sadly this site, like any other site, isn't immune to haters and crazies. They seem to slither through the cracks. Please disregard their posts and even though they may make statements as if they know what they are talking about, they probably don't and it's just their bitterness speaking. Also be careful with doing much research online. I know it's hard not too as your probably eager to learn, but try and save your questions for your doctor. He or she is really the best person to give you advice. If for some reason your doctor doesn't make you feel comfortable, find a new one. I have a great one who is very stress free. We talk mostly about social issues. He even gives me great recommendations on restaurants. This is really the norm once you get all your numbers in order which you will in time. Just don't stress and enjoy your life. Peace to you

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
kicker
Moderator

Reged: 10/25/10
Posts: 1131
Loc: GA, USA
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273775 - 09/06/13 12:41 AM

I am really sorry I missed this earlier for everyone involved.

Enough is enough. There are a lot of new people here lately and not everyone is at the same place. That said I see two wrongs here.

The first wrong was someone not recognizing that to people were hurting. The second was someone not recogning three people were hurting. Something for everyone to think about and be more tolerant about wouldn't you say?

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
riverprincessModerator
Moderator

Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1808
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273781 - 09/06/13 10:09 AM

Hey Kicker, I'm totally lost with what all went on with this posting , and I think I'd rather stay that way. No fuel from me for any fire.

--------------------
Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
notinterested
All Star

Reged: 09/07/11
Posts: 127
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273783 - 09/06/13 10:27 AM

I think new2 this post should be deleted. I think it will create panic and anxiety and nothing good will come of it. It's not what this site is supposed to be about. Please delete it.

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
kicker
Moderator

Reged: 10/25/10
Posts: 1131
Loc: GA, USA
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!! new
      #273784 - 09/06/13 10:59 AM

And so should yours, but yet there it is. Let it drop since no one seems to be able to be the bigger person (aka adult) at the moment and cool off.

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
notinterested
All Star

Reged: 09/07/11
Posts: 127
Re: Ok I am going CRAZY!!!!
      #273785 - 09/06/13 11:24 AM

Kicker, your blunt as we all know, and I have no problem being blunt with you as you know. It's irresponsible and even probably unethical to allow a random person on this site to give medical advise and very negative advice at that to someone recently diagnosed. You and riverprincess know better than that and as Moderators I would really hope so. Maybe it's been to long since you've been diagnosed that you forgot what it's like to be in the shoes of someone newly diagnosed. If you or river were actually able to do that, you would see how outrageous new2this post was. Let's not forget this is the internet. This person could be some anti gay anti HIV crazy religious person who is posting crap too upset people. On a side note, after trying to decipher your original post about someone not recognizing 2 people hurting?? Maybe I'm wrong but was that your way of justifying new2this post??? If so, that's pretty scary. That's basically saying it's ok to take your anger and bitterness onto someone who is newly diagnosed. As far as my post goes, it makes sense that you think my post should go as his only because I had the balls to call him or her out on their cruel post. As a moderator if you didn't understand that then we're all in trouble.

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Pages: 1 | 2 | (show all)


What's New at TheBody.com

Additional Information
0 registered and 1 anonymous users are browsing this forum.

Moderator:  TheBody, bogart, crabman, riverprincess 

Permissions
      You cannot start new topics
      You cannot reply to topics
      HTML is enabled
      UBBCode is enabled

Thread views: 8933

 
Jump to

Contact Us | Privacy Statement The Body

*
UBB.threads™ 6.2.3