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HIV Life >> I Just Tested Positive

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Richardph1234
New User

Reged: 06/15/12
Posts: 3
Just tested positive
      #263794 - 06/15/12 09:53 PM

Hello
I just tested positive on 10th June 2012. I am yet to be advised of my viral load, but my CD4 count is 334 and 29%. My Doctor described that as high, yet all I read is that normal is 400 and above, and treatment starts when it is 350 or below. I am petrified. I am getting tested again next Saturday. I was very sick with seroconversion and I am trying to comfort myself with the fact that my CD4 count will jump back up again now that I am over my illness. Can anyone offer me words of encouragement?

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Pos_in_Thailand
Regular

Reged: 02/01/11
Posts: 464
Loc: Thailand
Re: Just tested positive new
      #263797 - 06/16/12 01:21 AM

Hi there! I'm sorry to hear of your recent infection, but do want to let you know that you will most likely be ok and do well. You have taken the first steps, getting tested, accepting the results, and now working with your doctor to manage your health and keep yourself strong and feeling well. This is a BIG step and you are doing well, so congratulations to you for that. Keep up the good work, and don't turn back!

I know you are probably in shock right now and feeling a lot of very powerful emotions. That is normal and part of the acceptance process. You will work through them and start feeling good about yourself again. One of the best ways of feeling well and secure again is staying involved in your health management, educating yourself about your new situation and being proactive in your treatment and care. You will then feel empowered and take control of your situation - that is how to beat this!

It is likely that your CD4 levels will jump back up and that your viral load will decrease considerably once you get through the seroconversion episode. You should monitor this over the next weeks and months with your doc so that you have good information to work from when you decide to begin HAART medications when you decide to. Also, I would strongly encourage you to get your virus genotyped and sensitivity tested so that you have that valuable information ready to go when it's time to choose your medications. This may also be a factor as to when you want to start taking meds. Information is power and peace of mind!

The important thing is that you put your health first and take very good care of yourself. Get plenty of rest, eat a healthy diet, exercise as you can, and find out what HIV resources you have in your area to help give you the support you need. All of this will help you feel better and get you on track to a long and healthy life ahead of you.

You've also done yourself another big favor by coming to this forum and website and connecting with others who are like you, who can help you through the bumps and help you know you are not alone. This forum is filled with great people and great information that helps us all feel good and live strong and healthy. Please come here to talk and tell us what is happening - chances are that someone else here has or is going through the same, and there is such strength in numbers.

Please contact me if you wish to talk. I try to check in regularly. Keep working with your doctor(s) closely and get all the labs done so that you know where you stand and how to best move forward with management. Chances are that you will do very well - this is not the end!

I hope to hear from you soon and send you my prayers.

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riverprincessModerator
Veteran

Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1823
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: Just tested positive new
      #263806 - 06/16/12 07:57 AM

A way to see and understand about life being pos. There are 5 stages that we mentally/emotionally go through once you pass through just the senseless fear of being tested.

Stage 1-- You think being diagnosed as pos means a death sentence. Your fear is so great that you just about want to just die instead of the suffering that you think lays ahead of you. You can't sleep eat or even think. All you want to do is cry and find a hole to live in. But then comes.....

Stage 2 --You realize that the world didn't stop and that life actually still goes on . But you realize that life will never really be the same and you think of the what ifs. Each day that the sun rises and sets you find yourself accepting that this is here to stay .
You want to find out every bit of information that your hands can get a hold of . You research all the research. You inquire about lab work and the more you try to figure it all out the more your head just wants to go POP!!! Your totally overwhelmed by it all, exhausted and then comes .........

Stage 3-- You see that the only knowlege that you really need is that which pertains to you. And you see that although life has changed it's still ok . Sure you may wonder about who you can confide in . You learn about personal choices. You have a really good grip on what this all means. You may even being going to support groups to see how others are doing things with life. I call this also the color stage. That's when you see your life as a good thing again, The blues are bluer, greens greener, yellow brighter and reds bolder. Life actually looks good and you see that the problems in life that seemed sooo big are really quite insignificant now. This is a life changing stage that brings you to ......

Stage 4-- You want to help others that are just coming to terms with their diagnoses. You share how its not really any big deal, that there are worse illnesses that are unmanagable. You help them to see how in an odd way this diagnoses can actually be a blessing , Because you now see how precious it is and how you want all things to truly mean something. You may be back at work ( yes you can ) . Life actually looks like new opportunites . You see it's all just a matter of ATTITUDE ! And finally comes

Stage 5--This is actually a stage that ALL folks pos or neg must face . And that is when our life will end. But since we have already looked at death in stage 1 , we now replace that fear with a more realistic approach. And this can be truly amazing. And alot depends on each individual. I had friends that embraced their death by planning it all out themselves. They didn't run in fear, they took charge and empowered themselves . They realized it was just another stepping stone in their journey , a new chapter in their lives. And I can say I am soo blest to see the example they showed me.

I know this was long , but I believe well worth the insight.



--------------------
Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

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Richardph1234
New User

Reged: 06/15/12
Posts: 3
Re: Just tested positive new
      #263812 - 06/16/12 09:23 AM

Thank you. I am definitely in stage 1. I go back to work on Monday after a week off. I have to continue to work, or I will be homeless. Again, thank you for your beautiful words of encouragement.
Richard

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Richardph1234
New User

Reged: 06/15/12
Posts: 3
Re: Just tested positive new
      #263813 - 06/16/12 09:26 AM

Wow! What an amazing message. I feel very blessed to have received it. I have read it over and over again.
Regards from Australia

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Pos_in_Thailand
Regular

Reged: 02/01/11
Posts: 464
Loc: Thailand
Re: Just tested positive new
      #263853 - 06/17/12 12:40 AM

You're very welcome! I promise, taking action is a great way of getting through the shock and grieving process after getting the news. It sounds like you are doing a great job caring for yourself and managing this tough time - stay with it! You always have friends here to help you through. Keep us posted as to what happens; I'll be looking for your posts!

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Pos_in_Thailand
Regular

Reged: 02/01/11
Posts: 464
Loc: Thailand
Re: Just tested positive new
      #263855 - 06/17/12 01:10 AM

Thank you so much for posting these again - these are so valuable and such a great way to keep yourself on track and staying positive!

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aidslifequote
New User

Reged: 07/19/12
Posts: 3
Re: Just tested positive new
      #264711 - 07/19/12 03:04 PM

This is very unfortunate and I am sorry to hear that. However, now that you know, you need to make adjustments to your life that will allow you to live as "normal" a life as possible. Get the emotional support you need and make sure you live a healthy lifestyle. aidslifequote. co. za

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cm82391
Member

Reged: 03/08/12
Posts: 48
Loc: Reno NV
Re: Just tested positive new
      #264748 - 07/20/12 08:22 PM

This is exactly how I was feeling/dealing with when I was first diagnosed back in January.

My doctor had informed me of my CD4, just about 270 and they got me started on my meds. She then proceeded to tell me that my viral load was 100K, I remember asking "well, is this normal?" And she responded with "well, 0 would be normal". And that just put everything out on the table for me.

Yes I have this disease, yes my life didn't turn out as I expected it to, but its also opened up my eyes to so many other possibilities that I would have never taken advantage of before that day!

The best thing to do is embrace it, understand that you have it, it doesn't have you!

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Pos_in_Thailand
Regular

Reged: 02/01/11
Posts: 464
Loc: Thailand
Re: Just tested positive new
      #265301 - 08/06/12 09:59 AM

You got it!
Cheers!

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