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HIV Life >> I Just Tested Positive

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new2this
Newbie

Reged: 07/23/07
Posts: 1
I just tested positive and I'm scared
      #228880 - 07/23/07 07:46 PM

I tested positive on 7/19/07...there, I have finally said it. Although it's from behind a PC it's hard just the same. With my luck, I will probally die within the year. I don't look forward to, or welcome death, I'm just very scared and do not have enough information to deal with it. I don't know how long I've been positive but with my luck, I have been positive far too long for the treatments to work. I just need some one to talk to...

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Jackie__Blue
Legend

Reged: 01/20/07
Posts: 1186
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #228882 - 07/23/07 08:52 PM

It's never too late for medications. You can find stories of people that have had very high viral loads, practically no CD4s, in the hospital, typcially with PCP and when they start medications their health imporoves.

There's a lot to learn and deal with, but it will be OK. First things first. Find yourself a good ID doctor and make an appt. Before any decisions can be made you need to find out what your viral load and CD4 counts are.

It takes a while to wrap your mind around all this, I know. But you will.

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Florida69
Legend

Reged: 02/19/07
Posts: 541
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #228886 - 07/24/07 09:32 AM

I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis, we all know how hard it is to accept a positive test result. I too thought my life was over; trust me it has only begun for you and me. Living continues we have come a very long way with the fight of this disease. In fact, in my readings I just read that they are starting the first human trials on a vaccination in Atlanta. When I first came here in January 2006, I was exactly were you are right now. I didn't want to say it and give it any energy. It is very important to find a good Infections Disease doctor so that you can see where you are in progression of the virus and take the necessary steps, perhaps even medication, to keep you healthy for a long time to come. You are not going to die, you have to start living. I know this sounds very difficult, first you have to accept where you are and make goals on where you want to go. Take this as a wake up call, this is your life, live it. If there is anything any of us can do for you, just hit us up we have already walked a mile in your shoes and we all would be happy to help you find information. Take care, D

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SA_Intellect
Guru

Reged: 03/27/06
Posts: 247
Loc: San Antonio, Texas
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #228899 - 07/24/07 08:18 PM

Read the post below from one of the infectious disease experts from the site. It will make you feel better (I think).

http://www.thebody.com/Forums/AIDS/TreatExp/Archive/Pipeline/Q173719.html

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Survivor
Legend

Reged: 10/30/05
Posts: 3256
Loc: Get off the fence and live again!
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #228905 - 07/25/07 12:02 AM

We have all started posts like you have above... Some with better numbers than yours and some way worse... You wana fill us in on your fears?? Ask your questions... Give us alittle detail on what your cd4 / viral load and percentages are... Will help you fill in the blanks..

PS... Your going to live....

Eric

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still_here
Guardian

Reged: 02/01/06
Posts: 389
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #228968 - 07/27/07 07:07 PM

45 minutes after i was diagnosed (almost 2 years ago...wow!) i was sitting in front of a counselor hysterical with my bestfriend beside me. i just couldn't believe this was happening to me. i was convinced i was going to die right then and there. just the thought of it, the enormity of the situation had me panicking. as she let me curse & vent & cry & yell... i got quiet. i looked at her & asked what she had to say. she looked me dead in the eye & said, "you're not going to die, at least not today.." i was scared & confused & had no idea what to do, where to go, what was happening. i came here, posted & found the most helpful, supportive group of people i could have ever imagined. i stayed around for awhile. i felt safe here. i was stuck at home for 6 weeks until i was well enough to go back to work. this was my link to a comminality. here it is 2 years later, and baby... i'm a ROCKSTAR!! i picked myself up, dusted myself off & started to live my life. i take my meds (which i had to start immediately) got all my vaccinations (which i'm almost done with my hep vaccs) go to my ID like i'm supposed to, eat better than i ever have & feel pretty freakin good. i've even caught a cold or 2 and toughed it out. i wanna tell you it's not the end of the world, but.... until you can get comfortable with it, accept it & realize that this is the beginning of a new way to live, none of anything will make sense. nothing will make you feel better. just always always know, you're NOT alone. it took me almost a year to stop obsessing & just get on with life. sure, i have my moments, never seems "fair", but i just hold fast to my faith, trust myself, listen to my doctors, and love the people who have stuck by me. it's a tough road, but it's only as tough as you let it be. educate yourself, ask questions & relax. living with HIV (i prefer to call it cooties) is scary, but we all have some sort of cross to bear. cancer, lupus, dibetes... some sort of handicap. i guess in the grand scheme of things, it could be worse. it's not always a walk in the park, but at least it's a walk somewhere.

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needavise
Member

Reged: 08/01/07
Posts: 11
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #229058 - 08/01/07 06:13 AM

sorry to ask, and if you do not feel comfortable answering, it is ok. I been in sexual encounters, and i feel i have been pretty safe according to myself. I really wonders what kinda behavior was the one who made you test poz. i know some of us are very comfuse, still in 2007 how this get spread. besides the obvious no protected sex, but sometimes many of use wonders how safe we have been.
please answer if you can.
thanks.


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still_here
Guardian

Reged: 02/01/06
Posts: 389
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #229059 - 08/01/07 06:55 AM

i was in a relationship with a man who was HIV+ and he didn't tell me... that was 8 years ago & i just found out 2 years ago that i was poz when i ended up in the ER

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sharedStrength
Newbie

Reged: 04/12/07
Posts: 5
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #229276 - 08/09/07 08:41 AM

Hey, don't worry! Not that this isn't a big deal, it sure is. But there is a lot of hope out there. I tested positive in March of this year, after managing to stay negative for 18 years as a sexually active gay man. It was a real shock because I'd tried hard to remain negative -- but live does go on and it can be a long and healthy one.

My understanding of treatments is that they usually work really effectively even if you have had the virus in your system for a long time. You need to get a good HIV primary care doctor -- your local (or closest) AIDS committee can recommend one for you.

He or she will do tests to see how much virus you have and how healthy your immune system is. Then you can tell if you need meds yet or not (you might not). You can find out which meds would work for your particular version of the virus and which won't. You can also get advice about how to play even safer now and other things you can do to take care, not just of other people's health but of your own too.

It might sound scary to find this all out, but trust me, you are better off knowing than not knowing -- it is less scary then and it means you are taking control of the situation.

The virus affects everyone a bit differently -- but I have friends who have had it for 20 years or more. With more treatment advances over time, the outlook only gets better.

There is a lot of upset and confusion and heartache and anguish with finding out you have HIV. But it gets better! I promise that.

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Florida69
Legend

Reged: 02/19/07
Posts: 541
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #229277 - 08/09/07 08:58 AM

I am going to second what shared strength said, I tested positive in January of 2006. I know how hard it is, but you will be ok.. D

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thevillebear
Fanatic

Reged: 06/10/06
Posts: 66
Loc: KY
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #229294 - 08/09/07 08:13 PM

I found out I was positive in June of 2006, I think I had been positive for a number of months before that. Trust me it is not the end of the world and you will not die, at least not now. While ideally you should have been testing regularly and not let your CD4 count get so low before finding out you will recover and not likely die in a year. My BF found out he was positive when he wound up in the hospital with Pneumonia ,that was over 12 years ago he has been on many meds. but he goes to work everyday and life is mostly normal for him. It is not the end of your life, just a new and at times more difficult chapter in your life.

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Teatree
Newbie

Reged: 08/10/07
Posts: 2
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #229307 - 08/10/07 11:16 AM

The situation you are in is not that dire. With the wealth of knowledge we have to our disposal and with the grade of medicine available - there is hope. I was fortunate enough to be part of a team that supported a 5 yr old girl that was diagnosed with Burkitt lymphoma, pulmonary TB and HIV with a CD4 count of 153 all at the same time. It is two years later and she is running around with the sweetest attitude to life.
So the beginning is scary... but the road is rewarding.


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alive4216years
Member

Reged: 08/23/07
Posts: 14
Loc: Utah
Re: I just tested positive and I'm scared new
      #229776 - 08/23/07 04:16 PM

stand back and listen to what you are saying.
I know I have had this horrible illness for almost 20 years.
I am not going to tell you it is not painful cause it is.
But you can still have a great life.

Please get a support network in place for the times you get sick. Ask questions and research the problems that arise for you.

Remember somebody has to be here for the cure. I hope you are one of them.

I have for most of my 20 years had an undetectable viral load (since they have tested viral loads)

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