The Body: The Complete HIV/AIDS Resource
Follow Us Follow Us on Facebook Follow Us on Twitter Download Our App 
Professionals >> Visit The Body PROThe Body en Espanol

Past Forums (read only) >> HIV/AIDS in the Military

Pages: 1

      #71484 - 09/11/03 03:31 PM

is there anyone out there who has been in a pos/neg relationship? i was recently in one. i had a boyfrined for a long time before we found out he was pos. we were already in love and now due to that he won't even talk to me on the phone and he wants nothing to do with me and i know that he loves me! what can i do to get him back? people who are in this same situation please help me or if you no someone who is please help! i don't know what to do and i was wondering if this is a common reaction and does it last a lifetime? i can't loose what is now just a friend. anyone with advice who has been or is in a pos/neg relationship please help me understand this!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Baby Bear

      #75696 - 10/18/03 04:05 PM

I was living with a girl since 2001.
July '03 we were getting physicals to get married.
She tested (+).
I got symptoms of Herpese Zoster outbreaks and sinusitis for over 1 year. Military for some reason did not test me during PHA. Going to get tested anonymously first before military finds out. Very scared !
She thought I would abandon her but I did not. Hell, if I'm (+) then she will be all I got. Suicide, shock, anger, deep depression, loss, change of life, etc., etc. has been definitely on my mind. I want to kill myself but don't know how. I got to take care of her so this gives me reason to live. As soon as she goes, I'll follow it through I'm sure of it.

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  

      #75863 - 10/20/03 03:04 PM

i am really sorry to hear that. i wish you both the best of luck. it could be worse. atleast you do have one another. although i do not have it i am still suffering from it and i have no one. he won't even talk to me at all because he thinks i am better than him now and that he shouldn't be a part of my life anymore. from your experience do you see why he would feel that way. if so, is there anything i can do to change his feelings. best of luck!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
New User

Reged: 02/18/04
Posts: 7
Loc: Soon to be Southern California
      #90117 - 02/21/04 06:08 PM

Dont despair!

I have just recently gotten involved with a woman who is +, and myself being negative, I have never needed to know more than the very elementary basics.

But i really love this girl. The HIV isnt scaqring me off.

My best reccomendation is learn, learn, learn. Learn the risks, learn the precautions. From what I have been finding out, it is VERY possible to have a fulfilling, long term relationship with a + person, it just takes maturity and commitment.

The worst thing anyone can do is allow this awful virus to destroy their relationships. Then we all lose.

Good luck to you.

King Negativo to a VERY special Poz woman!!!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
New User

Reged: 09/09/04
Posts: 5
Loc: upstate N.Y.
      #111750 - 09/20/04 04:15 PM

Put yourself in his shoes a minute. He could be afraid of infecting you, punishing himself for past mistakes, mourning a future he believes is now impossible. Did he want kids? That's a complex issue in itself. He'll probably wonder at some point why you'd still want him with hiv. You might try offering a friendly ear for a while to start. Say something like, 'I know this is hard, it affects me too. If you're not sure about a relationship right now that's ok, but at least let's continue to be close and let me go through this with you.' At least he'll know you're trying to support him. You could learn more about it together.There will be times when he'd rather be alone, or not want to talk about hiv. Just be patient and present, let him dictate the pace and see how it goes. good luck, Kairin

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Pages: 1

What's New at

Additional Information
0 registered and 1 anonymous users are browsing this forum.

Moderator:  TheBody 

      You cannot start new topics
      You cannot reply to topics
      HTML is enabled
      UBBCode is enabled

Thread views: 7830

Jump to

Contact Us | Privacy Statement The Body

UBB.threads™ 6.2.3