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HIV Life >> Living With HIV

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New User

Reged: 03/16/13
Posts: 1
No Friends
      #271166 - 03/16/13 10:55 PM

I've became pos in 2010 at age 48. I'm now 51 yo. Of course I was shocked and just could not understand how I got HIV. All my life I practice safe sex, with the exception of giving in to doing a BJ on someone-which I firmly believe is how I contracted HIV.

I started meds 1.5 years ago. Atripla on the advice of my PC doctor. -Note he stated that I could wait to start meds if I wanted to. Anyway, I went ahead and got on meds. My numbers were good before the meds. Vl 3000, CD 4 780. Now I'm undetectable VL. I will have my blood work performed in 3 weeks to find out my latest numbers. I 'm a Vet, so I go to the VA here in Atlanta. Anyway. I have no friends and feel very alone. I've only told a few people of my family members. And certainly not my 14 year old kid. I don't want to put a burden of worry on her. I might tell her when she reach 21 years old. I'm worried about getting old-er and who will be there for me. All my life I've been there for others. But now I'm getting tired and lonely and don't know what to do anymore. I'm not even sure if my issue is all about HIV or just could be life in general. I just have no one to talk to. Here in Atlanta, people are very religious and judgmental if you don't fit into their type of person. Anyway, I'm just at a lost as to what to do and ready to give up.

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Reged: 10/25/10
Posts: 1131
Loc: GA, USA
Re: No Friends new
      #271170 - 03/17/13 12:21 AM

Contact positive impact located at 60 11th st ne in Atlanta phone is 404-589-9040 and ask to speak to Tony Crosby (I believe that is the correct last name about 98% sure) He runs (or at least use to) the newly infected support group. There you will have opportunities to meet others and be able to talk openly. They also offer counciling services as one on one. They deal with HIV positive individuals and most of the services are free or on a sliding scale.

Also check out M.I.S.T.E.R. It's a drop in center for HIV+ individuals and hosts quite a few social gatherings a month. Both can be easily found online.

Also depending on which part of Atlanta you are hailing from most of the aso around here have volunteer and social events that you can meet nonjudgmental people as far HIV is concerned.

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Reged: 09/08/11
Posts: 127
Re: No Friends new
      #271184 - 03/17/13 04:45 PM

I'd recommend keeping all options open. Kicker has some great information and resources. IIn addiition, look into joining a health club, or considering adopting a pet or volunteering at a pet rescue shelter. They are always in need of people who have lots of love to give. My dogs have brought me much, much happiness over the years. I also foster sick puppies and volunteer at our local shelter where I have met some nice people. If you adopt a dog, take the dog to a dog park. II've met some nice people there as well. If you don't like Atlanta, consider moving. I struggle with depression still quite a bit but I really try hard to just make myself happy. I try and think, happiness is my only option otherwise I just have to go bed and be sad. Who wants to do that? I think there are many resources to things, events etc... that can bring happiness, you just to find those. I hope things get better for you.

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New User

Reged: 10/23/12
Posts: 1
Re: No Friends new
      #271239 - 03/19/13 10:49 PM

Please don't think you don't have friends. It breaks my heart to hear newly diagnosed people feel that way. There are many available outlets for you to get the help you need, and the friends you just haven't met yet. I was diagnosed at 42, and am now turning 54 in the next few months. I've helped a lot of people through their first few years, just by being there for them to talk to. I don't live in your state, but I am more than happy to be friends with you and maybe even help you find resources in your area. If you will send me an email address I will properly introduce myself and you can ALWAYS communicate with me. I will even give you my phone number and you can call whenever you like. I don't want to post my number in here, so just let me know your email address and I'll forward my information to you. Don't let this bug get you down, that's very important. You can live a normal and productive life! Yes, its hard at first because you think people can 'see' that you have it. Rest assured, they can't. :-) Be well, and PLEASE let me help. I think I was given the "gift" so that I can be there to help others. I can honestly say I'be become a much better person since my diagnosis.

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New User

Reged: 03/29/13
Posts: 1
Re: No Friends new
      #271409 - 03/29/13 08:50 PM

I understand your fears and loneliness. I have been positive for many years and remained single as I felt that no one would want me. The shame and guilt is what is really hurting you. The sooner you see this as not you but an obstacle to manage and seek help to do so - you will move forward. I wish someone had told me this many years ago. Going through a bad stretch now but will persevere. Good luck

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New User

Reged: 04/03/13
Posts: 3
Re: No Friends new
      #271485 - 04/03/13 04:38 AM

i know how you feel. i too was shocked and couldn't figure out i got infected. i was always careful. as it turns out, my brother was infected, never told anyone and used my bic razor. instead of throwing it away, he put it back and then i used it. i still have not told my kids (17 and 18) either. they worry too much about me already. they see me taking meds but think it's for my iron and calcium deficiencies. don't give up. i too feel lonely and tired of this at times. you have to look at the good things going on in your life and focus less on the disease.

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New User

Reged: 07/02/13
Posts: 1
Re: No Friends new
      #272882 - 07/02/13 03:45 PM

I think your problem don't have anything to do with HIV, maybe your personality? you do not have tell everybody about your status, I think you should go out more maybe? I personally don't like to have lots of friends, I know a lot of people but don't call everyone a FRIEND! I also hiv positive for two years and doing well, Thanks GOD, don't feel bad , you are no different thank a HIV negative person,people feel lonely everyday and is because the life style in the U.S . work work and work . take time for yourself and enjoy life even more !!!!! at the end u have to love yourself more than anybody else will love you, I also have two kids, 12 and 13 years old and they don't need to know my status for right now, they have lots of pressure already and I am not going to add more. We live life once!! so please enjoy to the fullest !!!! LOVE ,DAY

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