Advertisement
The Body: The Complete HIV/AIDS Resource
Follow Us Follow Us on Facebook Follow Us on Twitter Download Our App
Professionals >> Visit The Body PROThe Body en Espanol
  Breaking News: FDA Approves Triumeq, New Once-Daily Combination Pill

HIV Life >> Gay Men

Pages: 1
otterman
Newbie

Reged: 04/02/14
Posts: 4
How many guys have you been with?
      #275875 - 04/02/14 06:43 PM

I am 27 and have had sexual encounters with 44 guys. Does that sound average for someone my age? How many have you been with?

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
anotherday
Moderator

Reged: 05/15/13
Posts: 420
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Re: How many guys have you been with? new
      #275883 - 04/03/14 12:41 AM

That's an interesting request, however, it is really something that is difficult to gauge. I guess it would depend on availablity, accessability and of course stamina. Putting notchs on the bed post might be something to be proud of but do keep your own personl health and safety should be the for-front.

With those numbers though, before I would go "bragging it up" I would be one to head to your local sexual health clinic as I mentioned to you in another post. Stay informed on HIV / STD / STI's ... it only takes one person not playing it safe to spread to as many people. It was these casual hookups that originally pegged HIV as the "gay man's disease", it has come along way since then though! Educating yourself and being aware of what your doing and who your doing it with is the key to keeping yourself safe and healthy!

The casual annonymous sex world can be considered quite fun for alot of people, but in the heat of the moment, one forgotten condom, broken condom, one look into someone's "honest eyes" ... and, well you know the story!

Educate my friend, educate!

Stay safe, stay happy and smile!

--------------------
anotherday ... in paradise!
daily ponder ... be the reason someone smiles today!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
riverprincessModerator
Moderator

Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1738
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: How many guys have you been with? new
      #275897 - 04/04/14 07:05 PM

Even though I am a female , can I still express my thoughts on this matter? If this statement came from a female , there would of been questions pertaining to why she felt like this was a lifestyle that she had to live. Sexual addiction is nothing to take lightly. And that goes for both males and females, straithy or not. Gender doesn't matter. What matters is the psycholigical reasons of why. It is a lifestyle that can be very dangerous and end up with deep regrets. So with that said , I am going to ask why guys think having many conquests is something to set a standard for. I see you as just another person who is walking on a dangerous tightrope. And I hope and pray that some deep inner searching will reveal your reasons as to not only why but will help you see to see why you should re-eval your life decisions. Yes we were given these bodys that desire sexual pleasure but it is more than just a physical aspect that we live and long for. And please don't take this harshly, that is never my intent. And I'm not being judgemental. Lord knows how I used my body to look for love and acceptance . But I'm older and like to believe wiser now. So please understand I speak from experience and concern for others.

--------------------
Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
anotherday
Moderator

Reged: 05/15/13
Posts: 420
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Re: How many guys have you been with? new
      #275904 - 04/05/14 01:06 PM

It's interesting you bring this to the table river, but it's true! I don't think it is a "sex addiction" issue as much as it is that "guy thing"!

"why guys think having many conquests is something to set a standard for" ... I know going right back to junior high school, growing up in a small town in Northern Canada that was always the daily talk. Girls got tagged as being trashy or slutty while the guys almost got adorned with medals because they had "slept" with every girl in school. Other guys envy the "jocks" that had the swarm of female admirers becase "he" slept with so and so.

Then comes the gay male, and places like the "bathhouses" and now online "hookup sites", The more conquests you have the more "experienced and professional" you become. I guess it's to establish some sort of resume! The more guys you have sex with the better sex encounter you could become!

I don't think there is really any answer to this, it's been going on forever, but the serious part is in the fact that, men especially, living in this lifestyle or this limelight ... get educated, stay informed, stay safe.

I'm not sure of the "notches on the bedpost" metality as in school I was much more a loner than a jock ... but whether it was "all talk" or reality, the key is keeping everyone safe and healthy, even in that kind of environment!

--------------------
anotherday ... in paradise!
daily ponder ... be the reason someone smiles today!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Bullyblast
Newbie

Reged: 04/09/14
Posts: 1
Re: How many guys have you been with? new
      #275934 - 04/09/14 12:22 AM

He was just stating a fact and asking a question, not "bragging it up". Perhaps you are just jealous. His number does not seem to be that high for someone his age. It certainly is not high enough for your negative judgement.

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
anotherday
Moderator

Reged: 05/15/13
Posts: 420
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Re: How many guys have you been with? new
      #275939 - 04/09/14 08:40 PM

I don't find my comments at all being a "negative judgement", he's stating an honest fact, I'm giving him an honest suggestion on how to care for himself when living within that lifestyle.

You being Mr. "Bullyblast" may want to fiind alternative ways to try and direct your comments on a more civil platform other than your own attempt at "bully" behaviour!

Comments like "perhaps you are just jealous" are rather petty and basically childish, and if that is the extent of your becoming a "newbie" on this website, to make posts of that nature, I'm sure there are other sites that will cater to those types of antics!

This site is very NON-judgemental, everyone here shares from experiences they have had or encountered. So before you get up on your "bullying" soapbox ... maybe share your story!

--------------------
anotherday ... in paradise!
daily ponder ... be the reason someone smiles today!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Heartflower
Newbie

Reged: 12/16/11
Posts: 2
Loc: Denver, CO
Re: How many guys have you been with? new
      #275940 - 04/10/14 12:19 AM

I'm 52 and I've been with much more than 44 guys. But at age 27 I'd just come out of the closet (late bloomer!) and had only one experience. I remember once being part of a speaker's bureau where we went to high schools - a gay and a lesbian together - and sat in front of the class answering questions about being gay. One student asked me how many men I'd been with and I got completely flustered. I was probably 30 at the time. I think I'd been with 8 guys. So when I recovered I said "8" and I asked the class if they thought that was a lot or a little. They laughed and told me it was a little. What a huge revelation that was! Even the women thought so.

My advice on this is to ask yourself why you feel like it might be a lot or a little, and why that number might make you feel shameful. My personal feeling is that the number isn't the issue, it's how you feel about it and why. As another poster pointed out, if you're having sex for the wrong reasons (inadequacy, addiction, power-over, control, etc.) then it might be way too many because fulfilling any kind of addiction actually reinforces it while allowing you to avoid facing the growth opportunity that it implies. But if you're having sex because you're blessed with some incredible guys that you're meeting, it might be just the right number!

Be well!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
PozInAmarillo
Member

Reged: 07/29/14
Posts: 61
Loc: Texas
Re: How many guys have you been with? new
      #277401 - 07/29/14 05:40 PM

Im 51. I certainly dont have an accurate number. But considering my first experience was at age 10 with an older man of 13, well theres 41 years of various sex acts that span everything from arcades and park bathrooms to serious relationships and now Grindr. Id guess the number has to be somewhere north of 300.

--------------------
Nobody can give you HIV. You have to take it.

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Pages: 1


What's New at TheBody.com

Additional Information
0 registered and 1 anonymous users are browsing this forum.

Moderator:  TheBody, bogart, crabman, riverprincess 

Permissions
      You cannot start new topics
      You cannot reply to topics
      HTML is enabled
      UBBCode is enabled

Thread views: 1821

 
Jump to

Contact Us | Privacy Statement The Body

*
UBB.threads™ 6.2.3