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Mary
Unregistered

I was abused by my father
      #3521 - 04/13/00 10:23 AM

I am 25yrs old. I was abused by my father till I was 19yrs. Then I stood up for myself & opposed it. But I am scared to tell this to anybody else. U are the first person. He never had intercourse with me but performed oral sex on me but I never performed oral on him.
Never kissed or anything like that.

I got married two yrs back & since then I am repeateadly having vaginal yeast infections. I trust my husband & am 100% sure that he doesnt have any problem. I have been treated for yeast almost 3 times since last year. I read that yeast infections can be early signs of HIV. But otherwise myself & my partner are in good health. Infact as far as I know even my Mom & Dad are in good shape. Could I be the one ? I am too worried about this & cant even talk to anybody. As my husband could understand that I never had intercourse with anybody when we had sex the first time after wedding. Furhter I am also scared to tell him about this as it might change his attitude towards me. How do I even tell my doctor about this & get myself tested?

Please help me.

thanks



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Jessica
Unregistered

Re: I was abused by my father new
      #3522 - 04/13/00 10:24 AM

I really feel for you. I am a 22 year old who suffered years of abuse at the hands of my father also. I dealt with it for several years by turning to drugs and just not facing the pain. I too am extremely afraid of having HIV, but recently I worked up the courage and got tested (I am currently awaiting the results). To be honest, I think most of my fear comes from guilt, anger, depression and all those other feelings that go along with being a victim of abuse. I think the same is true for you. You should be extremely proud of yourself for leaving that situation, that takes real guts! Now you need to get help for all the emotional baggage you carried away with you. No one could live thru what you did and not be affected. You really need to face your fears and learn to love yourself, telling someone is the first step, congrats! If you can't talk to your husband about it right now, than please find someone to talk to. Since you are an adult, a counselor would have to keep whatever you tell them confidential. Remember, HIV is not a disease you can assume you have based on symptoms, the only way to know for sure is to get tested. But I don't think HIV is your main concern, it's just something your focusing your guilt, anger, shame, fear etc. on. Get some help to deal with the abuse, then if you're still worried- get tested.

Lots of Love and best wishes,
Jessica




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Kim
Unregistered

Re: I was abused by my father new
      #4089 - 05/18/00 02:08 PM

Getting an HIV test is scary but it should be done. Recurring vaginal yeast infections could be a symptom of HIV but alot of women get yeast infections so it could be nothing. You can comfort yourself by knowing that unless you or your husband have done something considerably risky-like used IV drugs and shared needles, had a blood transfusion, or had sex with a gay or bi man, chances are that your test will come back negative. Just simply tell your DR that you would like a blood test done for STD's and HIV and I'm sure they will understand. You can also buy an at home test at most drugstores. They are highly reliable.



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