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Getting Pregnant Hiv +/- couple
#163775 - 11/09/05 09:32 PM
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I am a HIV + woman engaged to a HIV - man. We want to have a baby. What are the options on getting pregnant?? Is artificial insemination the only way?? I read on this website that it's possible to "do it yourself", insert the mans sperm in the comfort of your own home...but my fiance thinks it's insane (he's old fashioned) and keeps making references to the "turkey baster"! :) I asked a gyno in the past and she told me I was to young, I'm now almost 30 years old and I find the doctors are no help in the ways of getting pregnant unless it fills their wallets! I'm very frustrated. Has anyone out there gotten pregnant, and how! Feels like such a ridiculous question...thanks in advance.
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Well, I am + woman with - husband. We found out after we got married. I have 2 children from a previous relationship but he has none. He has always wanted one and I asked my gyno last week about it.
First of all you want to make sure YOU are healthy enough. Make sure your Dr feels safe for you to conceive, certain meds can not be taken if you conceive.
You can do it one of two ways....
1. Invetrofertilization-very costly
2. Keep track of your ovulation and only have unprotested sex when you are ovulating-risky
The only thing is it IS harder for a male to get it from a female that is why they say during ovulation only though.
Just keep in mind(not to get you down) but if you plan on this little family, is he prepared to deal with this child if God for Bid something happens. That is my fear for my husband, he has taken on my 11 and 8 year old as his but can he handle 3 children if he was alone????
Good luck
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debtex
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Hi,
I am also a + woman and my husband is negative. our son just turned 15 months old. Are you on medication right now? How are your numbers? as franfrog has said....you do have a few options. I know a woman who did the fertility way, yes I do hear its costly. then there is the turkey baster way. i know it seems odd.....but its the safest, and would be better off done focusing on your ovulation as well. (this way, it would be much less frustrating). and there is also the way of unprotected sex (but really......i would learn your ovulation calendar and it would be much less risky if you had an undetectable viral load on medications).
depending what you are on for medications right now, if you do get pregnant, you may need a medication switch. (i know keletra cannot be used during pregnancy, but I'm not sure what else is not safe). it used to be suggested that a c-section is the only safe way to go, but as long as you have an undetectable viral load throughout your pregnancy, it is ok to have a vaginal delivery.
please let me know how you are doing? how long have you been infected? and how are you doing medically?
i wish you all the best.
love and prayers,
debbie
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Read this stuff
http://www.thebody.com/whatis/women_pregnancy.html#tips
If you are undetectable you could do it naturally just when you are ovulating....(get an ovulation kit) that minimizes, doesn't eliminate the risk for the guy
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Yes, like Debbie said. They do say the c-section is the safest way to go. When having the child vaginaly the chances of fluid passing is more likely. Also, I am on Sustiva which is also not suitable if you are pregnant. Not sure what else.
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I just had my counts done last month. My T-cells were about 650 and my viral load was around 370. I'm not on any medication, I have been on a drug holiday for a little over a year now. I was on Combivir and Viramune but I now have a resistance to the Viramune. My counts have been very good since getting off the medication and I have been positive now for 7 years. My dear hubby to be and I are still in the stages of trying to get this all figured out. But I'm going to be 30 next year, and between age and the fear that I might lose my stamina for children in the near future, I feel the clock is ticking. I do know there is the chance that he will be on his own raising our child, which is one reason we have been putting it off. He says he can handle it, but who really knows I guess. One good thing is we have a good family support system in place so I know he won't have to deal alone. If I did get pregnant I would want a c-section...can you request that, or is it the doctors choice? I'm supposed to go to the gyn this week, it's a new doctor, I haven't been to one in 2 years as my last one really upset me and I'm scared to go back and ask questions of yet another doctor who will probably not give me straight answers and make me feel bad for wanting children in the first place. Part of me thinks it wasn't meant to be, but I'm not ready to give up yet.
Thank you very much for your responses, I really appreciate it.
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debtex
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hi...
well your number are in good shape....and you'd do really well...as long as you are able to maintain an undetectable viral load. i dont know why this gyn would make you feel so irresponsible about this decision. although alot of physicians (even my pcp at one point when I first got married)...told both me and my husband "he could tell alot of horror stories if we wanted to have kids" !! that was really quite upsetting. then when I learned how safe it could actually be...we looked into it more. and since I work at an ID clinic, I knew there was a great GYN doc that we always call when a person is diagnosed and pregnant. the best thing about her was that she was also trained in infectious disease....so she gave it to you straight!! and for the MOST PART....it was less than a 2% chance if you are able to STICK to your regimin by STRICTLY never missing and keeping undetectable viral load. (even on a vaginal delivery, which you may be able to request....but with this doctor, she preferred if any woman could do vaginaly...it was better on the healing process on the mom). during delivery they administer AZT thru IV. (its just been the protocol for years), and the baby would have to take azt for 6 to 8 wks.
hopefully this physician gives you all your options, and is straightforward about it. of course you NEVER want to hear that "its possible", or "there are certain risks"....but even if you didnt have hiv.....any average pregnancy runs almost a 30% chance of some kind of risk.
look into this new doc. find out if she knows anything or has had any training in infectious disease. because you want a doctor who is comfortable with a person who lives with hiv.
i wish you and your husband all the best!! please let me know how it goes.
love and prayers,
debbie
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My understanding from many Dr's was you have a greater risk of passing with a vaginal. I have had 2 c-sections just because my children were to big but I had no problem post surgery. I also had to do it by myself. I feel you have less of a risk by c-section and as long as you have help, you are better off. I would rather my child be safe then 1-2 days of recovery for me.
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debtex
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but it is safe, providing your viral load remains undetectable. just as all the antibodies from you and your blood pass thru the baby when you are pregnant, it is safe, as long as your medications work. the infectious disease OBGYN that delivers babies (esp for women who have hiv) advises that it used to be believed that it was safer. but as long as you are undetectable...it is just as safe for a vaginal delivery. I dont even think you can "ask" for a c section at my hospital unless its necessary.
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Maybe if you saw a female doc, she would be more understanding. Many many women with HIV are having children and if there are doctors making them feel bad they are in the wrong profession.
Stand up for yourself. Get a doctor you like. You counts are great. Have confidence that you'll live a long time! Just take care of yourself and always take your meds on time!!!! See an hiv specilist not some idiot with attitude.
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Was so consoling to get a familiar problem i have faced . Yours is a better case cus your fiance knows about your status . However , all u need to do is to take to condom filled with his sperm , draw the sperm using a syringe and pump it into you . I imagine it will be a warm feeling . If he doesnt feel free about it , then u dont need to do it infront of him . The moment he comes , you may take it to the bathroom and do your thing. Goodluck
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debtex
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That isnt usually an effective way. It MAY be possible, but the lubrication in condoms usually kill sperm.
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If you are working on getting prgnant Sustiva is a HIV med that can affect the fetus. So if you are on Sustiva you need to let your doctor know so your meds can be switched. This is the first time I'm at this site. I tested pos 15 years ago. I've been a Pediatric and Youth HIV/AIDS case manager for about 12 years in CT. We have not had a positive child be born in our state in years
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