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Scared
Unregistered

Too afraid to get tested
      #1597 - 04/02/00 11:13 PM

I need someone to help me,by giving an HONEST opinion. Before I go any further, please, do NOT say "Get tested". I simply can not! I get ill just thinking about it. Here is my scenario...over 13 years ago, I had an affair (one night deal) with a man. A few weeks later I became very sick (flu like). Since that time, I have worried EVERY DAY that I may be HIV+. I have no reason to believe this man was infected, but I just think WHAT IF he was, and WHAT IF my "flu" after our affair was no coincidence. HE appears to be in good health, as does his wife, and my husband. (I am assuming that if we were to become infected, so would our partners). Of course this was in 1987 when there wasnt alot made over hetrosexual aids so I didnt really think anything about it at the time. My questions are these. 1. What is the liklihood that 4 people could be HIV+ after 13 years or more (assuming if he WAS HIV+ I have no idea to know HOW LONG prior to meeting me) and not be ill???? 2. My husband and I both had recent bloodwork done (CBC's and some sort of profile). After 13 years, wouldnt SOMETHING show up in that bloodwork that would be suspicious, thereby causing doctor to think about possibility of AIDS? I know that many are going to say GET TESTED...I simply can not..I am violently ill as a write this just thinking about it. I guess what I am asking here is for someone to put my mind at ease and tell me its the GUILT, that is driving me crazy and that the chances of HIV are low. OPINIONS..please!






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Gloria
Unregistered

Getting tested is the only way you will know new
      #1598 - 04/02/00 11:15 PM

The only way you can find out if you are HIV positive is to get tested. If you want just donate blood and you'll find out that way. They test all blood for HIV--and if your only risk was 13 years ago--you'll find out. There is no real way to guesstimate how risky the exposure was--it depends on so many factors--the state of your immune system when this happened. It also depends on his background--Has he had lots of unprotected sex with different people? Is he bisexual? Has he used IV drugs? YOu could be at risk for other sexually transmitted diseases--not HIV! Have you gotten an HPV test?If he had no real sexual past and no bisexuality and no intravenous drug use then he could be low risk--that makes your one exposure low risk. But really to not know for 13 years puts you in the category of masochist. It's very likely you are negative!!! HIV is not as easy to get as you'd think. So why you like to torture yourself I'm not sure. You just need to feel like a bad girl I guess. But it's a long time. Just find out--donate blood. And relax, 13 years ago HIV was not so common in the non-drug using heterosexual world. But find out for sure!!! And go on with your life!!! And perhaps go into therapy to find out why you need to feel bad.




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Anonymous
Unregistered

Donating blood new
      #1599 - 04/02/00 11:16 PM

I know someone told you to donate blood as a way to be tested, NEVER do that. if you are HIV positive and they just test for antobodies and you're one of the very few who don't develop antibodies, you just infected whoever recieves your blood if you have HIV. testing is anonymous, and if you do have HIV it will prolong your life because you'll know and you can get the treatments to make you feel better rather than just letting it run it's rampant course and rapidly killing you. My question to you is if you cheated on your husband, what's to stop him from having cheated on you and brining HIV home to you? not to mention the whole other list of STDs that can infect you??? HM? Mess around on someone and there is no plus side... not ever.





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Gordon
Unregistered

Re: Donating blood new
      #1600 - 04/02/00 11:17 PM

True, donating blood is not recommended, but if it's a risk that happened 13 years ago, if she has HIV, it will show up by now. It is extraordinarily rare for it NOT to show up after 13 years.The American blood supply will never be completely safe since so many people giving blood don't even know they are at risk! (ie wives with cheating husbands, people who don't know their spouse abused IV drugs previous to the marriage, spouses of bisexual men, etc.)






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Chichi
Unregistered

I had the same fears as you new
      #1601 - 04/02/00 11:17 PM

I had same fear just like you. I felt the same way. Now I realized that If I got HIV, then our immusystem gets week. But I think that it will NOT happen right after your one night stand. i mean that If you were HIV+,it would take time you to realize that you get flu easily.
also it 13 years ago, so the posibilty is very low. >I need someone to help me,by giving an HONEST opinion. Before I go any further, please, do NOT say "Get tested". I simply can not! I get ill just thinking about it. Here is my scenario...over 13 years ago, I had an affair (one night deal) with a man. A few weeks later I became very sick (flu like). Since that time, I have worried EVERY DAY that I may be HIV+. I have no reason to believe this man was infected, but I just think WHAT IF he was, and WHAT IF my "flu" after our affair was no coincidence. HE appears to be in good health, as does his wife, and my husband. (I am assuming that if we were to become infected, so would our partners). Of course this was in 1987 when there wasnt alot made over hetrosexual aids so I didnt really think anything about it at the time. My questions are these. 1. What is the liklihood that 4 people could be HIV+ after 13 years or more (assuming if he WAS HIV+ I have no idea to know HOW LONG prior to meeting me) and not be ill???? 2. My husband and I both had recent bloodwork done (CBC's and some sort of profile). After 13 years, wouldnt SOMETHING show up in that bloodwork that would be suspicious, thereby causing doctor to think about possibility of AIDS? I know that many are going to say GET TESTED...I simply can not..I am violently ill as a write this just thinking about it. I guess what I am asking here is for someone to put my mind at ease and tell me its the GUILT, that is driving me crazy and that the chances of HIV are low. OPINIONS..please!






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