|
midwestguy143
|
|
Newbie
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 04/09/09
|
|
Posts: 3
|
|
Loc: Columbus, Ohio
|
|
my strange reaction
#245285 - 04/09/09 11:10 AM
|
Reply
|
Quote
|
|
|
I tested positive on March 24, 2009. The thing that surprised me, and my friends was my reaction -- none really. Just something else in my life. I had lost my job many months ago, and with the job market being so tough, I've gotten used to the rejection and empty promises, so this was like something else that is 'just happening' in my life. I didn't cry, get depressed or get angry, I just told the guy at the clinic: 'We are a product of our choices.' Reading about Buddhism and Taoism has helped a lot. I'm waiting for all my test results and now I'm worrying about how those will be and what I'll have to go through if things are bad, but still it does not weigh on me. A friend said this is not good -- not having emotions towards anything happening with my status -- and I should talk to someone soon. I feel fine, look fine but I am emotionally void. Is this bad?
Post Extras:
|
|
|
|
Hey Midwestguy,
I tested positive on March 20, my first two days i spent in bed crying and then went back to work for the week .. all went well once i was busy, but days off again spent upset and depressed... i think know i`m starting to come to terms with it and deal with things in a positive way!!
I guess , everyone deals with things in a different way!! it`s a huge shock...maybe you`re having a delayed reation to all that news? .. In any case i wish you the best for the future!!
dreamer
Post Extras:
|
|
DEFCON1SQcdc
|
|
Newbie
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 04/01/09
|
|
Posts: 5
|
|
Loc: New York, USA
|
|
|
To midwest' and dreamer. I tested positive in December of 08, just days before my birthday and my life has been a bit of a rollercoaster ever since. I spent the first few weeks, just feeling like I was in a void or a bubble. I don't know how I got through it. My bf of 6 yrs has left me, I moved out of the apartment we shared and go to work week after week. The past few weeks for me have been so tough. I spend a lot of time in the shower just crying and hoping that my roommates don't hear me. I feel as if there is some kind of hump I have to get over so that I can get on with what my purpose here on earth is. Does anybody else here feel that way? Better yet, has anybody gotten over the hump and started *living* again?
--------------------
Let the world see your inner strength and inner beauty!
Post Extras:
|
|
midwestguy143
|
|
Newbie
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 04/09/09
|
|
Posts: 3
|
|
Loc: Columbus, Ohio
|
|
|
Yeah I know someone. This guy I'm seeing, has known he's positive for 6 years now and lives a very happy life, he doesnt let it define him. I'm not there yet, hopefully soon.
Post Extras:
|
|
christo
|
|
Newbie
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 03/23/09
|
|
Posts: 8
|
|
Loc: Oregon
|
|
|
I tested positive last in March also on the 10th. It is very mind-blowing my first reaction was the worst and I don't think I fully am realizing it. I go to work everyday like normal but sometimes it really hits me, if I am looking at a guy and thinking to approach him or if he approaches me, when I sneeze or cough all day, or just wondering "when it really gets bad, how will it be", will someone find out and I lose my job. But mostly now I think what is really important in life, family, friends, helping others, living a life of joy and happiness and to it's fullest. I think the virus just make you more aware.
I realize we all have a beginning and an end. It is the in-between that matters and how we live it. Yes a bad mistake was made for some and now this virus is there. But there is so much to do and so many people to help. Engulf yourself in making things better for both yourself and those in need and it makes you feel better. If I continuously think about the virus it takes over, if I continue to think about a happy life that takes over.
I think just keep active, strength your mind, body and spirit. Find that higher power and trust that everything will be ok if you want it to be.
Take Care of yourself
Post Extras:
|
|
midwestguy143
|
|
Newbie
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 04/09/09
|
|
Posts: 3
|
|
Loc: Columbus, Ohio
|
|
|
wow. thanks man. Buddhism and Taoist philosophy have helped. all that ties into your sentence 'But mostly now I think what is really important in...' You are correct. Its just sometimes it does overwhelm.
Post Extras:
|
|
christo
|
|
Newbie
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 03/23/09
|
|
Posts: 8
|
|
Loc: Oregon
|
|
|
I understand you, it does overwhelm. But it will get better. I feel since it is just so new, it is just so hard to grasp and believe it has happened. It is good to have that support tho, and an uninterrupted life that goes on as normal. I get nauseous now and that scares me but i am learning to handle things as it comes, stay centered and strong. Eat healthy and live healthy but don't lose that adventure and sponteniety that keeps you feeling alive.
Post Extras:
|
|
Icare
|
|
Newbie
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 07/16/09
|
|
Posts: 3
|
|
Loc: South FL
|
|
|
It is a rollercoster. I have been positive since 1990. I understand the void feeling well. I think it maybe a instinct thing. We live in an age when this disease can be managed. I have been on meds since 1996. The best advice I can give you, is take action. Actively seek out the best healthcare you can get, even if it is a government program, learn as much as you can. The more you learn, the better decisions you will make for your life. I wish I could tell you someone would take care of you, but that is NOT TRUE. The sooner you realize you must take control of your situation the better off you will be. In the end, you will have to take the medicine, excersize, eat right and followup with your healthcare advisors.
I know things will get better. I am living proof that it can happen. Keep your chin up. Find a support group from your doctor and go.
May you have peace of mind and strength to take action.
Post Extras:
|
Previous
Index
Next
Flat
Threaded
