|
|
Bitter and sweet
#242804 - 10/20/08 02:14 PM
|
Reply
|
Quote
|
|
|
In april i met the most beautiful man that after about 4 weeks I knew I was going to spend the rest of my life with him. I asked him to marry me and although he didn't say yes, it didn't stop him from dating me. Then in june I was diagnosed being HIV positive. Then two weeks later, the worst day of life happened when he tested positive as well. It's a 99.9% chance that I was + first and gave it to him. He is the most amazing person. While its hard to him to understand that I am always going to feel guilty, he takes responsibility for the situation as well. So we have decided to move on with life together as planned. Just now we have this extra burden to carry with us. He's a foreigner so being HIV+ is creating difficulties is staying together (If he files for citizenship its unsure if or when he could go home again, if i go to his country, we can get married but he may not be able to come back the he U.S. permanently) His viral load is high and our PCP wants to start meds and he's not ready. We've only told a handful of people so our support system is limited, but overall im thankful because i realize we have more than some people. A partner that supports and understands, access to healthcare, and hope being that with meds and treatment, we can expect to live a long, healthy life. obviously with many bumps in the road. But isn't that any life? It sucks and its scary to think about this disease living on my body, even harder to think about giving it life on another person's body that i care so deeply about. However, there's so much life for me, him, and us and i want to be a part of it all for as long as possible. Maybe im fooling myself into some deluded thinking or in denial a little bit, but is there anything wrong with thinking positive? (Funny how that word has taking on a whole new meaning) to any who read this thanks and good luck
Post Extras:
|
|
August69
|
|
All Star
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 03/22/08
|
|
Posts: 79
|
|
|
|
|
I believe the USA is in the process of changing the way the border guards deny access to HIV pos. people. I think it is still illegal to enter the USA if you are positive.
It used to be the fact that if you were HIV pos you were automatically denied entry. They have since legally took the wording of Hiv off the list, but you can still be denied as having a communicable disease. This goes for Immigration as well. If the authorities find out he is pos, he may be given a one way ticket to his home country with a do not return policy.
I hope they change the laws soon, and hope everything works out well for you. Good Luck and keep up hope.
Post Extras:
|
|
Barbdoll
|
|
Regular
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 07/30/08
|
|
Posts: 39
|
|
Loc: Belize
|
|
|
Hello,
I am not from the US, from Belize actually. If he goes back to his country to get married he will definitely not be able to enter the US for a while. However, i do know that they do not ask you your HIV status at a border. They don't have the right to. Furthermore, when he starts applying for his papers that's when the questions will fly about his status. If he is married to you then maybe it will be different. They might give it to him. I also wonder if i meet someone from there if i will be accepted as a citizen when i get married and stuff. Please keep me posted about that, cause that is something on my mind.
On the contrary i want to tell you that you are a very lucky person right now to have someone by your side. Believe me it will be a lot easier for you especially if you love each other. I am having a huge problem dating and finding some one special. Sometime i give up and see my life ahead with just me and my children. A harsh reality for me cause God knows i prefer love over single. Just hang in there and stay together cause mien i cry many nights being home in my bed all alone, and not knowing if that will ever change.
Barb
--------------------
Barbara A
Secretary
Belize City Belize
Central America
Post Extras:
|
|
|
|
I do not believe the United States has yet lifted it's restriction against people with HIV entering the US.
Post Extras:
|
|
Robert1
|
|
All Star
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 05/29/07
|
|
Posts: 96
|
|
|
|
|
You can live a long and happy life if you take HIV medications before your cd4 count falls below 350 or even 500!
By the way, what makes you think you gave HIV to him? You just tested first. He may have had HIV for awhile. What country does he come from?
Post Extras:
|
|
Tori
|
|
Newbie
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 11/23/08
|
|
Posts: 5
|
|
|
|
|
What if you are HIV+, an Amerrican citizen and left the country for vacation or other short term travel. Will they deny an American re-entry?
Post Extras:
|
|
|
|
Dear bobsstar1979
So sorry to hear about your diagnosis, I was in that same shoes not too long ago myself (Jun 08). I am happy to hear that you are already thinking about your future life together, and considering treatment options. In my mind, managing HIV is no different than managing any chronic health condition: you are disciplined, take precautions, and take care. Life is as good as you want it to be.
Just to be upfront, I'm not an immigration lawyer, however, being immigrant myself, I have been through these hurdles, so I know a thing or two.
1. from what I gather, you are female and can legally marry him. Not to state the obvious, but gay marriages are not recognized in US at federal level, and grant no immigration rights. Regardless of his HIV status, he will be granted immigrant status, as INS applies a waver when in comes to marriages to US citizens. In other words, he cannot be legally denied based solely on his HIV status . Processing the application usually takes < 6 moths before he gets temporary green card, so he can travel back home.
2. if he is already a permanent resident (he has a green card), he had already been through the initial process (fingerprints, background investigation, HIV testing). When applying for citizenship, he will not be asked to disclose his HIV status again
3. to answer another question posed in this thread, a US citizen cannot be denied entry in the US based on his/her HIV status. The ban is still active for foreign nationals coming to US (but will hopefully be lifted soon)
So you are in good shape. I would however suggest to get an experienced immigration lawyer, just to be on the safe side. Better safe then sorry.
Hope this helps, and best of luck!
Post Extras:
|
|
August69
|
|
All Star
|
|
|
|
|
Reged: 03/22/08
|
|
Posts: 79
|
|
|
|
|
They can't deny an American Citizen from returning, as long as you can prove you are who you say you are. But if you are not an American Citizen you could be denied entry.
Post Extras:
|
Previous
Index
Next
Flat
Threaded
