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HIV Life >> I Just Tested Positive

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Reged: 03/29/08
Posts: 1
Bisexual dating issues..for recently 34 yo guy
      #238112 - 03/29/08 09:24 AM

I just found out I was positive about a week ago. My first week has gone surprisingly well.. I am optimistic, already knowing that HIV is not the death sentence it was was..and benefiting from having other HIV positive friends. I've told a few friends, which I'm finding is the most difficult part.

I think one of the hardest issues I'm dealing with as a bisexual, is my belief that finding a woman to settle with will be near impossible now. I've dated men, and there are plenty of date-able ones here in SF. But for a few years I have come to the realization that I prefer being in relationships with women.

Anyway, I'm just wondering if I should just give up on my dream of settling with a woman altogether as I have no idea how many dateable single poz women are out there.. i know there are plently of poz and poz-friendly men to date in SF. Should I just give in , and go against my true desire? I don;t want to be single my whole life

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Reged: 02/23/08
Posts: 47
Re: Bisexual dating issues..for recently 34 yo guy new
      #238114 - 03/29/08 01:40 PM

First find out what you really wanna do.
Take care

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Reged: 12/21/05
Posts: 1390
Re: Bisexual dating issues..for recently 34 yo guy new
      #238116 - 03/29/08 09:52 PM

I hate to tell you this because it probably sounds condecending. But its way to early for you to be making decisions that affect the rest of your life. It may take a couple of years for you to adjust to being HIV positive....( well some people take more time some take less but you get my drift).
Concentrate on you.
Make YOU the focus of of your energy.
Make YOU the best you can be.
Make HIV a part of your life.
The rest will evolve.

6 ft tall poz bear in Philadelphia

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Reged: 03/21/06
Posts: 581
Loc: South
Re: Bisexual dating issues..for recently 34 yo guy new
      #238153 - 03/31/08 03:26 PM

Bear is right on target. There are just too many other issues that you need to be dealing with. In my humble opinion, the last thing you need is creating situations with the possibility of additional "issues" (i.e. "drama").

Best of luck,

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New User

Reged: 05/15/08
Posts: 2
Re: Bisexual dating issues..for recently 34 yo guy new
      #239316 - 05/15/08 07:49 AM

I just read ur post and want to ask you something - yes to settle down with a woman is ur desire - but have u thought what it would be like to settle with a fella?? Ive been HIV 4yrs now - I am a gay lad living in Northern Ireland - I use to be a complete male slut with women in my teens - then i turned to males and i felt very comfortable with lads - In the time ive been HIV ive had many relationships with lads who have been Neg but never worked as i tend to go for the Ruff and ready type and it ends up all wrong lol...

I just want to tell you - Live life to the full (as i do) and dont let ur dreams stop you - if you want something go get it -

Ive come to the conclusion - Ive had that many relationships they dont work for me and I am quite happy living on my own with my dog (Smurf) lol...Ive thrown myself into my work and starting up 2 businesses with my best mate at the mo, so ive no time to wipe my own ass lol.... I hope you get ur dream - as I have...Speak soon m8.
Roars x

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