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HIV Life >> I Just Tested Positive

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dj1979
Guru

Reged: 03/02/06
Posts: 276
Loc: rural upstate NY
The break didn't help
      #183888 - 04/02/06 04:15 PM

Well, the break didn't help at all - I think I still have HIV. (that's my weak attempt at a little humor)

Actually, what the break did is make me realize how ANGRY I am at the man that gave me HIV. I have heard from a reliable source (a friend of his girlfriend!) that he absolutely knew he was HIV+, and he didn't tell me or use protection. I want to make this man PAY in the worst way. I'm not sure the authorities in our little rural town would be knowledgeable enough to know that what he did is a crime - a felony, I believe. I know it's been successfully prosecuted in bigger cities. Anyone know of anyone that has been successful? Or am I just wasting my time?

On a positive note, I had a nice couple of days. Took my daughter (age 8) to the park a couple times, played ball outside with her today, and cleaned up our porch. Now it's supposed to snow on Tuesday.

I'm getting closer to the doctor's appointment date - only 10 days away now, which seems so much closer than 3 weeks. I can only assume that if the labs showed something horrible or unexpected, he would have called me already.

Hubby is doing okay in jail - I went to visit him twice this weekend. He's worried about me seeing the "other guy" while he's in there, or having another affair. (that was my only affair) I told him first of all, I wouldn't touch that guy with a ten foot pole (unless it was with a gun!), second of all I'm HIV+ and no one who knew that would want to have sex with me, and third of all if I don't tell someone then I have committed a felony, and I won't even go over the speed limit! So I guess he's pretty safe while he's in there and I'm out here.

How's everyone? Eric how's Will doing? Anyone still waiting get any new test results?

Have a good day!

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Survivor
Legend

Reged: 10/30/05
Posts: 3256
Loc: Get off the fence and live again!
Re: The break didn't help new
      #183899 - 04/02/06 05:06 PM

I suppose I would be angry to if I new without a doubt who infected me and that he new about being +ve. I am not sure I personally would have the energy to focus so much power into a lawsuit. I think (for me) I would consintrate on living and moving on. Revenge (for me) is not sweat.

Boy do we have some exciting times. Hubby in jail or has a unidentified mass in his chest. DJ Will had his 3rd CAT done on friday. This is all being sent down to Dr. Ben in Denver who will hook us up with a surgeon who will most likely biopsy it. Which means more hospital stuff... I am doing better. There is absolutely no more I can do at this stage of the discovery except give it over to God and love my husband. We will see what happens next when next comes..

Love & Best Wishes

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Bear60
Legend

Reged: 12/21/05
Posts: 1390
Re: The break didn't help new
      #183906 - 04/02/06 06:07 PM

DJ darling.....I keep saying to you that its going to take a LONG time for you to come to terms with the anger you feel.....at the person who infected you....at yourself for getting it...at .....well you fill in the blanks. It was the ANGER that was doing me in back in 1991 2 3 4. God it was awful!!! Luckily I had great support groups and learned how to FORGIVE

--------------------
6 ft tall poz bear in Philadelphia

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: The break didn't help new
      #183912 - 04/02/06 06:25 PM

I don't think it would be better to get on the revenge path. It always comes back to bite sooner or later. Just lead a moral life and let your case be an example to other spouses who are tempted to break their marital vows. Your honesty after the fact has inspired me to be faithful (still single) and to really watch out for myself. Stay strong.

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: The break didn't help new
      #183943 - 04/02/06 09:26 PM

Call the local Health Dept and report him THEY Will Fix his ass if they can.

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dj1979
Guru

Reged: 03/02/06
Posts: 276
Loc: rural upstate NY
Re: The break didn't help new
      #183946 - 04/02/06 09:43 PM

Really? Well, it's worth a try - guess I'll be making that phone call tomorrow!!

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AIDS2HIV
Unregistered

Post deleted by Becky new
      #183949 - 04/02/06 10:20 PM



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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: The break didn't help new
      #183950 - 04/02/06 10:29 PM

[quote]be prepared for wasting alot of your energy,time, and money trying to pursue your anger....Good Luck & God Bless*
[/quote]
You cannot be serious?!?! This person KNOWINGLY had HIV, and had unprotected sex with her on numerous occasions. As a result of this, he was knowingly passing the virus to her. Its against the law to do this, and he deserves to be punished. I personally don't think its a waste of time for her to do so.
Yes, she made the decision to engage in these activities with this man, but he also is at fault here and I hope he pays.

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rain05
Fanatic

Reged: 01/24/06
Posts: 67
Loc: MD
Re: The break didn't help new
      #183954 - 04/02/06 11:00 PM

dj,
I think that you should call the health department and report him. Crime, be it moral or not should be punished. Intent is the main angle here. It's one thing to unknowingly pass this on. However, it takes a certain type of person or a person who is going through something in his or her life to knowingly do this. Yes we are all responsible for our own actions, but intent, intent. Intent is the difference between 1st and 2nd degree murder!! My advice would be to definately report him and whatever you do beyond that is your decision to make. If it were me, I would report him but I donlt know if i would take legal action. I think that I would if it protected others. Good luck darling.

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: The break didn't help new
      #183977 - 04/03/06 05:09 AM

You have a moral responsiblity to report him, so he doesn't go around knowingly infecting others. It is a public health issue.

Call the local health dept. and the district attorney. It is not you who will be pursuing a case against him per se, but rather the state. Don't listen to that your word against his word nonesense.IYou have a fiduciary duty, particularly if you have it on good authority that he knowingly infected you (What is to say he hasn't done it to others??) .

I'm in Canada and there have been several recent cases of HIV+ men and women being charged by the crown for knowingly engaging in unsafe sex. It is considered aggravated sexual assault here. Óne man was just sentenced to 15 years.

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sadface
Legend

Reged: 02/15/06
Posts: 797
Re: The break didn't help new
      #184013 - 04/03/06 10:51 AM

Is his gfriend + too? What a mess hon. I would report him, see what happeneds..I think just reporting him will give you the closure you need. Stay strong and healthy. And call me..I miss you!

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: The break didn't help new
      #184673 - 04/05/06 09:52 PM

Honey,

Do you live in a trailer park? Sounds like you and Hubby should be on Jerry Springer.

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briannan
Expert

Reged: 02/22/06
Posts: 124
Re: The break didn't help new
      #184675 - 04/05/06 09:54 PM

RUDE and uncalled for, Anon!!!!
You don't know anything about her or her husband, who are you to judge???!!!
Obviously you are here because you've made a mistake or more!!!

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firefly
Guardian

Reged: 01/22/06
Posts: 431
Loc: Orange County, Calif.
Re: The break didn't help new
      #184685 - 04/05/06 10:22 PM

No ,sorry Anon, she is not a neighbor of yours.Go back to frying your pork bellies and watching your fave show, as you scratch yourself silly. You should have a little compassion for people and get off your high-horse! Who the heck are you?

--------------------
You are a diamond in the rough !

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alivehoping
Legend

Reged: 04/05/06
Posts: 655
Re: The break didn't help
      #184716 - 04/06/06 01:55 AM

i beleive there have been cases already tried befor the courts that would help in your situation,in ny there was a guy tried for attempet murder for not disclosing,he infected 4 diffrent girs with hiv,and in canada another guy was sent to jail for the same things,so im sure there are laws that would pertain to your situation,look in a legal area on the net.mabey the dept,of justice,or youe state archives,hope this helps you good luck and take care

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