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HIV Life >> I Just Tested Positive

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Just Got The Call At Work...
      #180237 - 03/16/06 10:16 AM

Well, it's official...3/16/06 @ 9:55 am...the doctor called to tell me that he had some "good news." The news was that my CD level was "normal" (539). I got excited and said, "so it means that last week's test was a false positive?" To which he replied, "Oh no, you've got it!"

I guess I was hoping for a miracle. Now comes the hard part, telling my wife of 20 years and my three adoring children what I've done and what has happened. I guess I'm getting what I deserve for my sins.

I'm waiting for all of this to sink in and for the flood of emotions to over take me (hopefully not here at work). I know that God is with me, but I am really feeling somewhat alone. I could use some encouragement.

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sadface
Legend

Reged: 02/15/06
Posts: 797
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180241 - 03/16/06 10:23 AM

I am so sorry hon. What did you do actually that put you at risk? You cam pm me if you want. I am going through the torture of the window period right now. How far did you test out before you got the first poz result? Were you with another woman or man??? Let me know, I am here for you!

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sadface
Legend

Reged: 02/15/06
Posts: 797
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180251 - 03/16/06 10:59 AM

Did you ever think maybe since you were so careful that she gave it to you??? Could she of had an affair?? You need to open and honest with her and talk this through. I was unfaithful to my husband and I am "patiently" (ya right) waiting for my 3 mo conclusive. I tested neg at 3.5 and 6 weeks, but I am still a complete wreck!!! I am praying for you all the way....

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Blixer
Legend

Reged: 01/10/06
Posts: 599
Loc: Missouri
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180263 - 03/16/06 11:41 AM

The good news is that your CD4 count is in good shape for now. You have time! Trust yourself and trust your spouse. It is possible that you might want to get a counselor to help you work through this in talking with her.

I wish you the best. This isn't the end of the world. There is lots of hope and you can have a very normal life.


--------------------
David
Sustiva, Epivir, Videx EC


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littleprince
Fanatic

Reged: 03/15/06
Posts: 64
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180296 - 03/16/06 02:00 PM

sorry to hear about the news. i am still waiting for mine next week. and i know how you're feeling. it's confusing and so overwhelming. i suggest you speak to a counsellor and let it all out. that's what i did. i felt a lot of pain melting away inside my chest.

keep in touch with anything that will lift you up, this community included.

--------------------
You Are What You Tolerate.

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Bear60
Legend

Reged: 12/21/05
Posts: 1390
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180348 - 03/16/06 07:12 PM

Doctors!!!! Ya cant live with em and ya cant live without em!!! lol
Seriously: that was very callous the way the doctor expressed that to you. It happens ALL the time. Doctors are busy, they arent counselors. etc etc Still, it would be nice to hear hear how gentle and sweet the doctor was rather than how short and gruff he was.
My best wishes for a healthy 2006 and beyond.

--------------------
6 ft tall poz bear in Philadelphia

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Survivor
Legend

Reged: 10/30/05
Posts: 3256
Loc: Get off the fence and live again!
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180379 - 03/16/06 09:19 PM

Well fuck of day isnt it? I am so sorry about your diagnosis. You are human this has NOTHING to do with sin in the sence that you are being smittin with hiv because you sinned. This is just life. There are so many many people in the same situation that you just put on paper including your heartless bastard of a doctor. You have some decisions to make. You CD4 counts are allowing you some time before alot of action as far as meds. Please seek out an ID specialist and get going on a doctor that cares about you as a person and not as a victim.

As for your wife and your family... That is hard. Love outways conditions such as HIV. This is not a death sentence, its an inconvienience is all. You will need to get your wife tested I am sure of that. This is hard times for sure, but love wins out in the end. You need to talk more to us and tell us what you are thinking, and what you are doing... We are here to help you my friend. Register so we can call you by name and get to know you better.. But only if you feel comfortable...

All my Prayers..


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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180431 - 03/17/06 01:36 AM

Sorry to hear that you got the call, and that the doctor told you in such a way. You comrads here are right, doctors sometimes are doctors. If you do not think he is a knowledgeable doctor, you must locate one fast. Not to be alarm, but the difference is great as for treatment and the best. If you think he is quslitify, then stay with him, if you don;t think he is, then you got to do have you got to.
Good luck,

God bless and take care.

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180473 - 03/17/06 10:18 AM

Thanks to all of you for your support & encouragement. Knowing that I have others to vent to and bounce things off of makes a world of difference. I will sign up as a users so that I can keep in touch.

By the way, I took someone's advice and asked my doctor to refer me to someone who specializes in treating patients with my issue (it's still hard for me to say the name). I was able to schedule an appointment with the new doctor three weeks from now.

I hope to tell my wife the week before Easter, when she is off of work for vacation. This would give her a week to let some of this sink in and not have to worry about emotionally falling apart at work.

In the meantime, I plan to put some things in place BEFORE I tell my wife. Things like finding possible housing, opening an individual checking account and closing credit card accounts that are in both of our names. I feel I must do this because she warned me several years ago that if an man ever cheated on his wife, she should force him to leave their home, destroy his reputation, and take as much of the finances as possible to teach him a lesson. I would hope that she would not be so heartless as to do that, but I can't take that chance.

I will contact you guys once I get a Username. THANKS AGAIN FOR ALL OF YOUR PRAYERS AND SUPPORT! It is truly priceless.

Gary

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180486 - 03/17/06 10:50 AM

If you want someone to write you at least?
here is my addy
zabdyy@yahoo.com
having someone to talk to always help.

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180505 - 03/17/06 01:31 PM

Thanks for the well wishes man (as well as the humor). I'm gearing up for the journey. Hope the ride doesn't kill me.

Gary

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Survivor
Legend

Reged: 10/30/05
Posts: 3256
Loc: Get off the fence and live again!
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180629 - 03/17/06 09:23 PM

hiv aint gona kill ya... it will take a few changes but aint gona kill ya.. Take care of yourself. Fill is in with what cha r thinkin...

Love

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Survivor
Legend

Reged: 10/30/05
Posts: 3256
Loc: Get off the fence and live again!
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180630 - 03/17/06 09:28 PM

maybe she will kill you?!?!?!?! I am just kidding. We try and stay postive about this thing... Call it a "condition." You have time to set things in order as you stated. You are as far as I can tell are thinking clearly and protecting yourself from "her". This is about you right now. Focus on YOU. Protect yourself, but also remain calm as you can. Stress is a killer and does not help your counts either.. I am glad you found an ID doc, thats great. Continue this process my friend. Lots of people are thinking and praying for you...

Love

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moonstarchild
Guardian

Reged: 02/28/06
Posts: 369
Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180711 - 03/18/06 10:59 AM

Just be positive(no pun intended) about your situation. Studies have shown now that those of us(poz) can live just as long as those of them(neg). Stay here on the board to check in. If for nothing else it's free therapy.:-) All the best to you.
Charlene

--------------------
HIV is a part of me, but it does not define me!!!

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Just Got The Call At Work... new
      #180782 - 03/18/06 07:02 PM

[quote]hiv aint gona kill ya... it will take a few changes but aint gona kill ya..
Love [/quote]

No, but AIDS or drug toxcities might. It is presumptious of you to say that it ain't gonna kill him. Lots of people still die from AIDS & you don't know his body.

Most of your posts sound like you are trying to convince yourself more than anything else.


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