Advertisement
The Body: The Complete HIV/AIDS Resource
Follow Us Follow Us on Facebook Follow Us on Twitter Download Our App
Professionals >> Visit The Body PROThe Body en Espanol

HIV Life >> I Just Tested Positive

Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | (show all)
daisey6205
Legend

Reged: 09/08/05
Posts: 1091
Loc: kansas
eeek! brain damage!
      #168387 - 01/02/06 06:11 PM

hello everyone. happy new year. as most already know i was diagnosed + in sept 2005. it has been a long 4 months from constantly being sick to having to deal with my husband who is + also and the list goes on and on and on (as i am sure everyones list does).
lately (probably the last month) i have felt like i can't concentrate like i used to. i forget everything. i tried to unlock my office door with a bottle of perfume! i know it all sounds nuts and good Lord knows i never claimed to be same, but this is bad! I am taking lexapro(anti-depressant) and my estrogen. i am not on any other meds and am just not sure what to think of all this. my energy level is going down and i am just exhausted all the time. i feel like i did right before i found out i was +. at this point my vl is below 50 and my cd4 count is in the 800's. i do not go back to the doc until the 9th of this month for checkup. my last appt was 3 months ago.
someone please tell me this is not hiv related. i know i have been stressed out, but everyone gets stressed out. i feel like i have brain damage.
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!
love and prayers to all
daisey

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
MsLola13
Fanatic

Reged: 12/12/05
Posts: 64
Loc: United States
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168388 - 01/02/06 07:16 PM

I would say its not really hiv related - its moreso related to stress. I also had a few spells of "forgetfullness" and other related symptons (fatigue) when i was first diagnosed.. Mine was from just thinking too much (most noticed when i laid down to sleep). In fact, i still have that problem sometimes. lol

You'll be okay, trust me. Hang in there girlfriend!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
daisey6205
Legend

Reged: 09/08/05
Posts: 1091
Loc: kansas
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168391 - 01/02/06 07:33 PM

i am sleeping........ once i hit the pillow i am out cold! i am usually in bed by 10-10:30 and up at 6. but when 6 rolls around i don't want to get up and i am beat by the time 5 rolls around. during the day i feel like i could very easily lay my head down at work and SLEEP.

Thank you.
daisey

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
MsLola13
Fanatic

Reged: 12/12/05
Posts: 64
Loc: United States
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168392 - 01/02/06 07:53 PM

hmmm well i did have fatigue early on but i used to work out like 2-3 hours a day.. kept that up for two years after testing poz.. eating healthy and my usual 45 mins to 1 hour cardio, plus hour of weight training.. but now i commute an hour to/from work and it just about kills me after a stressful day at the office..

With the new year, i'm focused on working out again.. so that should increase my energy.

i know you're tired, but if you can manage a 30 minute walk every day, perhaps you can boost your metabolism?? and in turn get a little more energy (and its an excellent stress reliever).

i dunno, works for me.. hang in there!!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
daisey6205
Legend

Reged: 09/08/05
Posts: 1091
Loc: kansas
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168394 - 01/02/06 08:03 PM

thank you.... as long as i am just flat not loosing it from all this, i am sure i will be ok. i walk alot with my job, but maybe a more vigorous walk would do me some good.
:) daisey

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
shadesofgrey
Legend

Reged: 12/02/05
Posts: 724
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168396 - 01/02/06 08:05 PM

maybe your lexapro needs to switch, wellabutrin doesnt seem to interact(i dont think) with hiv medication. it also gives you some pep. sometimes anti depressants stop working, because it sounds like you are very stressed and depressed although God know what you have to be stress and depressed about, just getting through the day would be an accomplishment with all you have to handle. oh and by the way i have not tested yet, will be doing that on wed very nervous about it, i suffer from depression and anxiety and i put the iron in the refrigerater. love and peace

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
daisey6205
Legend

Reged: 09/08/05
Posts: 1091
Loc: kansas
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168399 - 01/02/06 08:15 PM

you made me laugh. i will be praying for your test to be -. i understand what you are going through. there is a website i go to for just a little laughter each day, you may have heard of it. it is called gigglechick.com. she is so funny. you might try it
i have used wellbuterin in the past....notice i said past. i have been on lexapro for almost 3 months. i used to like it, but now i am starting to wonder if i need a higher dose?
don't be nervous about testing. just remember that hiv does not change you and if anything else it makes you realize just how strong you really are, even when you think you are not.
love and prayers
daisey

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Survivor
Legend

Reged: 10/30/05
Posts: 3256
Loc: Get off the fence and live again!
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168406 - 01/02/06 09:47 PM

Well I think I need a labotomy!! If I dont shut down this stinkin thinkin now its going to wreck me.. I to have good and bad days.. Today was bad.. And its not about physical. I am on Paxil which I really think helps my roominating. You might ask your doctor about it.. My IDS recomended it.

Here is my thing. As everyone knows, I have been digging and digging up stuff about hiv. I have been over to aidsmeds.com and got the bajeezus scared out of me. There is a friend of a person who has decided to stop meds and let the virus run its course. Of course, we dont know all the why's and wherefors. Then the topic got into what long term hIV'ers have to deal with vs. short term HIV'ers which I am. OMG I am freaking out again! I dont know if I should just close my browser and beleive what my doctor tells me. However I feel it necessary to talk with everyone to get a well rounded opinion on what the future holds. Ok, I know, you only have today. WELL I WANT MORE than that. So I talk and get replys of stuff that freaks me out.. What do I do, who do I trust. I like what Dr. Ben says, but is he just sugar coating my prognosis?? I am cussing right now! Faith, why is it so hard right now for me.. I think I need a hug. And labotomy, and Paxil, and reashurance, love is good to. Dam it! I go for my checkup on the 13th. Tests to be done, then a few weeks later? Meds or no meds. Dont have a clue. Frankly, I am just pissed off, again...

Sorry for venting... Im scared again...

Daisy lets get together.. I still know what keys look like, if you can just turn the knob.. We will be fine..

Love


Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
jenn
Guardian

Reged: 09/14/05
Posts: 325
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168407 - 01/02/06 10:26 PM

No Eric, a professional like Dr. Ben does NOT sugar coat. Plus,remember what I told you about Charlotte's Web. Getting 200 opinions doesn't mean the majority rules. It doesn't work like that. There is an awful lot of gossip and untruths out there. You need to believe the person that is the expert, - the real expert - not an MD that is a self proclaimed expert. Believe me, with the hell I have been through in my life, there are several self proclaimed MDs that say they are experts. They are not. Dr. Ben is another Dr. Shah.

Daisey, to me it sounds like you are experiencing massive stress (and justly so based on everything you have gone throgh).

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
shadesofgrey
Legend

Reged: 12/02/05
Posts: 724
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168408 - 01/02/06 10:36 PM

wise lesbian once told me ask 100 people and you will get 100 answers. i guess everything is scarey when you deal with the unknown, here i am sitting here all xanax's up to do a test on wed , which should be neg, condom intercourse and as anne put it on aidsmed.com a few nibbles at oral sex wih no ejaculation so very low risk but hey guess what i am scared shitless. we het scared and than we get use to something , i think it goes that way, eric there are alot of people living with hiv on meds that never post how wonderful they are doing. that post you read on the othersite did not say why he was giving up, maybe he is baiting his friend , you never know the whole storyl. you my friend , you are going to be here for awhile, i plan on meeting you and your other half and you getting me a discount at that hotel you work at,lol. my brain is fried but its most likely because i smoke alot of dope when i was a teenager, dont touch the stuff now. someone told me praying is talking to God. mediation is listening to God. Eric listen to God he is speaking to you, especially when you are posting those upbeat notes. love and peace

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
daisey6205
Legend

Reged: 09/08/05
Posts: 1091
Loc: kansas
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168409 - 01/02/06 10:43 PM

wednesday is the big biopsy on top of everything. i will be so glad when life calms down, even if it is just long enough for me to see if i am normal, whatever that may be. i just have days i wonder if this is what God had in store for me or if this was just all a self-fullfilling prophecy.... to live a hell on earth or what? i am just not used to being like this all the time. i mean i have my dumb attacks, but i just feel beyond dumb. no offense to anyone, but right now i feel like the epidimy of a really bad blonde joke! i told my docs office i was forgetting things, important things. i started crying on the phone with them, but they did not seem to concerned. lets put it this way.... i had to go pick up my mammogram to hand carry to a specialist. first i forgot the mammo, had to leave and go get it. it was done at a mammo place about 6 miles from the boob specialist. i got there and instead of going in it dawned on me that i was at the wrong place. i drove about 20 miles out of my way to go to the place "i thought" did the mammo. went running in to get my films and they told me i did not have them done there. i had to drive all the way back to the first place i was originally at! then back to the specialist! hope i provided some laughter to all!
love
daisey

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
shadesofgrey
Legend

Reged: 12/02/05
Posts: 724
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168411 - 01/02/06 10:51 PM

just a thought daisy i do believe you are under a stremendous armount of stress and when i stress i cant remember s--t. i have dont things that make what you did with the mammo a cake walk. once i even sat in a gyno office for 30 min, signed in and everything waiting for my appt. i was wondering why everyone was looking strange at me. i went to visit a friend of mine at the hospital with fluffy wolf slippers on, i am 6 ft and 220 lbs of butchness, that was a site. i by no means want to undermine the importance of making sure its just stress, just know that us everyday people do these things all the time, will keep you in my prayers. love and peace

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
daisey6205
Legend

Reged: 09/08/05
Posts: 1091
Loc: kansas
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168412 - 01/02/06 10:54 PM

boy, so i guess this does make me normal? *lol*
thak you so much. it just isn't like me to be so dumb. i do feel somewhat better though, so thank you all.
love
daisey

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Survivor
Legend

Reged: 10/30/05
Posts: 3256
Loc: Get off the fence and live again!
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168416 - 01/02/06 11:18 PM

Oh God... I feel so much better. I am laughing! You people, you wonderfully briliant people, I love you.. I am crying again... I think I need to go to the OBGYN tomorrow and see if maybe I am a women dressed as a man or man that thinks hes a women. As long as I have you to talk with I will make it...

Daisy, I know this is your thread and I appologize for intruding.. I want nothing but the very best for you.. To think of you and what we are dealing with helps me so much through my day... GODS WILL, NOT MINE BE DONE. Just help us please be ok with this... Amen...

PEACE TO YOU

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
jenn
Guardian

Reged: 09/14/05
Posts: 325
Re: eeek! brain damage! new
      #168419 - 01/02/06 11:37 PM

I used to work in southern NH, and I live in central MA. One day I was driving home at night from work (driving SOUTH to MA) and I drove over an hour and saw big signs that told me to keep driving 40 more miles to see the White Moutains of NH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was going NORTH the whole time!!!!!! It was over two hour drive to get back to central MA!!!!

Post Extras: Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | (show all)


What's New at TheBody.com

Additional Information
0 registered and 1 anonymous users are browsing this forum.

Moderator:  TheBody, bogart, crabman, riverprincess 

Permissions
      You cannot start new topics
      You cannot reply to topics
      HTML is enabled
      UBBCode is enabled

Thread views: 34772

 
Jump to

Contact Us | Privacy Statement The Body

*
UBB.threads™ 6.2.3