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We live in Africa and my husband has HIV
      #953 - 03/31/00 03:15 AM

My husband and I recently found out that he is HIV+. Despite
rigorous/intrusive infertility treatment, I am negative. We were
tested together shortly after we got together - I was negative
and we just found out that the Doctor 'lost' his results and just
assumed he was negative and told us such. For the fertility
treatment, my husband was given extensive tests - we found he was
+. We went back the the first dr and he 'found' the origonal
results - My husband was positive then. I have worked for the
last 9 years in HIV/AIDS education, both in the US and most
recently here in Africa. The irony is not lost on us. I have been
fighting the ignorance/prejudice my entire professional career
and now it is directed towards us.... life is funny sometimes. I
am American, my husband is German and we live in Africa. We are
now searching for a place where we can be accepted, happy and
where he can have health insurance so we can afford the cocktail.
The US immigration policies are 'difficult' for people with HIV -
even though we are married. I would not be able to work in
Germany. We cannot get insurance in So. Africa. His numbers are
VERY good and we have SO MUCH HOPE. He is healthy and strong. We
need the cocktail. We live in tiny place where everyone knows
everyone. We have told very few people as we could be deported. I
am known for my work in HIV/AIDS education and feel torn about
'lying'. My husband has his own business and cannot risk the
possible 'fallout' if his status were known. We are suing the dr
and are afraid of this publicity. We are so lucky to have each
other. We had our 1 year anniversary 2 months after finding out.
As the walls of our life have fallen down around us, at least we
are still standing in the middle with our arms around each other.
I look forward to the day when we know where we are going and we
can have a few days of peace.

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