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Family and Friends >> My Loved One Has HIV/AIDS

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Reged: 08/29/11
Posts: 4
My husband just tested positive for HIV
      #257705 - 09/21/11 12:58 AM

Thank you all for the encouragement. I do love him, I always have and always will. He started treatment immediately, and had his first round of follow up blood work, but I don't think he's had his next round and I think he has blown off his next visit with his infectous disease doctor. The stress has hit me in the joints and overwhelmed me with fatigue, but that's my body's "normal" for stress. When I try to talk to him, he shuts down. He says that we are NOT going to discuss HCV or HIV! I have a problem with this, but I'm trying to give him space. We have not told any members of our family, including children or grandchildren, about the HIV. I've been open with our immediate family of HCV. He's so embarrassed and so ashamed, and I totally understand. I work in the medical field and am still careful who I talk to about Hep C! But I wish he would talk to me about how he's feeling. We haven't talked about fear or future or anything since the first visit to the infectuous disease doctor. I'm worried about him not following up with the doctor, although he takes his meds religiously - the follow up is so important, in case treatment needs to be tweaked! He just turns it off when I try to talk to him. Thank you all for letting me talk - this is scarier to me than when I was diagnosed.

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Reged: 02/02/11
Posts: 464
Loc: Thailand
Re: My husband just tested positive for HIV new
      #259652 - 12/28/11 06:05 AM

I'm sorry to hear that he is having problems talking about the diagnosis, but encouraged that he is taking his meds faithfully - that's a BIG step in the right direction. He will probably become more comfortable and talkative about this situation as time goes by. He is grieving right now and probably feeling a lot of disappointment, especially if he senses that this has clouded the trust in your relationship.

Be patient. Gently encourage him to attend his appointments and to keep on top of his labs. It's such a shock to deal with, and it will take him time to digest this unexpected event. He will come around, especially if he knows you are open and there for him. Again, I pray for you both. Please let us know how things go.

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