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Past Forums (read only) >> HIV/AIDS in the Military

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MA2
Unregistered

A wild ride
      #188146 - 04/26/06 07:56 PM

Hello, I am a master at arms stationed in washington state. I am writting this post as encouragement to the individuals on this thread. This past 7 months have been HELL!!! I am a married man who made the mistake of sleeping with numerous girls in an stupid attempt to maintain my "image". After having my little sexual affairs, I began worrying about HIV/AIDS, and that's where this wild ride began. I wasted so much time, resources and weight worrying about if I had contracted this terrible disease. My marriage is broken into tiny peices and I don't think things will ever be the same i.e trust issues. My point is I had numerous tests done and spent over 6 hours a day looking at hiv websites and readings posts over and over and over. I have basically been a slave to this hiv shit for 7 months. Well, basically I just found out that my 7 month test was negative and I'm ready to move on. I wanna say to all you brave folks living with this virus, please keep your heads up, scientists are on the verge of discovering better treatment methods to combat this shit. And to all the worried wells living as slaves to the anxiety the window period causes, hold it together. I hate this disease, whoever let this shit get out of hand should have their heads chopped off. In another month I will begin safe sex awareness work in my community to help fight this disease. Thank you to all who read and keep your heads high!!!

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MiamiLat
Guardian

Reged: 12/30/05
Posts: 396
Loc: Miami, FL
Re: A wild ride new
      #188174 - 04/27/06 12:10 AM

What a relief it must of been for you after all those months of worrying! I am delighted to read about your future involvement with your community about safe sex awareness. I hope you will also be able to pick up the pieces and salvage your marriage.
Good luck!

--------------------
"Education, prevention, awareness, research, and support"

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daisey6205
Legend

Reged: 09/08/05
Posts: 1091
Loc: kansas
Re: A wild ride new
      #188286 - 04/27/06 03:39 PM

good luck with your marriage. it sounds like you are on the right track. congrats on your negative test and finding the courage and strength to test.
best of luck always to you and your family,
love
daisey

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: A wild ride new
      #188296 - 04/27/06 04:25 PM

yeah, it's been crazy. I am ashamed of the cowardice I have displayed throughout this ordeal. I really discovered that I'm not as tough as I thought I was

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: A wild ride new
      #188298 - 04/27/06 04:27 PM

Thanks tell me about your experience are you infected or a worried well!! Are you in the Navy

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: A wild ride new
      #188327 - 04/27/06 08:20 PM

Damn its good to hear you made it through, Man. I'm a PO2 statiioned here in NBVC at Pt. Mugu, CA. going through the same shit you went through. I'd love to ask you a few questions. You can e-mail me at PO2.peacoat@yahoo.com.
I really look forward to hearing from you, Man...I have some questions regarding this drama and the Navy that could really use some answering. Thanks..Dave

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: A wild ride new
      #188340 - 04/27/06 09:25 PM

MA2....my e mail address is P(zero)2.peacoat@yahoo.com. I didn't want to confuse you because I know PO stands for petty officer but that address was already taken. Thanks. dave

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SA_Intellect
Guru

Reged: 03/27/06
Posts: 247
Loc: San Antonio, Texas
Re: A wild ride new
      #195661 - 06/12/06 07:55 PM

I went through spats in which I worried I had exposed myself to hiv. I started worrying again at the beginning of this year and decided to go in for testing in March to get some peace of mind. It was the second test I had ever done and it came back positive. Even though I didn't feel sick at all, I thought I would just kill myself. I couldn't believe I had allowed that to happen despite knowing better and knowing that I should have used protection every time. I felt and still feel so fucking stupid. I knew better.

Anyway, those in my family who I have told have been great and are the reason I am still moving forward. I've told two friends (one of whom is in the Army) and they are great as well. Luckily other things in my life started going my way around the time I found out like starting a new job which I am liking a lot. My insurance benefits kicked in 3 days after I tested positive. I figured God was putting things into my life that would make me strong enough to handle this bulshit, which is what it is. So, I am going to try and live with it and see where His road takes me.

I am struggling to continue dreaming about the future given that I no longer feel confident about how long I'll be around, even though they say with meds people with hiv can live a normal life span.

I wanted to get married and have kids. That's all surely out the window now. I'll probably live the rest of my life single and alone.

If things do go downhill, I could always whack myself later. But I am hoping there will be a cure before I get to that point.

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: A wild ride new
      #209483 - 10/02/06 05:30 AM

Well, I am an ex-navy wife and I can say while my husband was in the navy he constantly cheated on me. At one point I was scared I had been been infected with HIV because HE chose to sleep around but i was not. Now my marriage has come to an end. The fact that he betrayed me and there was no more trust ruin the marriage. So I can speak from your wife's side. When you cheat on your spouse you cause that trust that you work so hard on to be broken, then the fact that you put her at risk. That is a hard pill to swallow. I can' t say I have much sympathy for you. However I am happy for you wife. So do you plan to do anything different? And think about this you put your wife the woman you love at risk to maintain yourself image. That is so selfish GROW UP

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: A wild ride new
      #214210 - 11/10/06 08:36 PM

[quote]Hello, I am a master at arms stationed in washington state. I am writting this post as encouragement to the individuals on this thread. This past 7 months have been HELL!!! I am a married man who made the mistake of sleeping with numerous girls in an stupid attempt to maintain my "image". After having my little sexual affairs, I began worrying about HIV/AIDS, and that's where this wild ride began. I wasted so much time, resources and weight worrying about if I had contracted this terrible disease. My marriage is broken into tiny peices and I don't think things will ever be the same i.e trust issues. My point is I had numerous tests done and spent over 6 hours a day looking at hiv websites and readings posts over and over and over. I have basically been a slave to this hiv shit for 7 months. Well, basically I just found out that my 7 month test was negative and I'm ready to move on. I wanna say to all you brave folks living with this virus, please keep your heads up, scientists are on the verge of discovering better treatment methods to combat this shit. And to all the worried wells living as slaves to the anxiety the window period causes, hold it together. I hate this disease, whoever let this shit get out of hand should have their heads chopped off. In another month I will begin safe sex awareness work in my community to help fight this disease. Thank you to all who read and keep your heads high!!! [/quote]

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