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HIV Life >> Living With HIV

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Reged: 06/23/12
Posts: 8
This disease today is an mask for a blessing in my life today
      #264792 - 07/22/12 06:33 PM

Things came to me today or i`am trying to say this morning,because i woke up and i`am looking at things different and my heart is fill to the rim with joy.whatever it mean i`ve a good feeling about this feeling because it never every happen to me before in my life.but whatever it is i know that it`s coming from the good lord. i just can`nt explain this because it`s new to me and it`s a good thing.


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Reged: 12/25/11
Posts: 1895
Loc: Jersey Shore
Re: This disease today is an mask for a blessing in my life today new
      #264809 - 07/23/12 02:26 PM

A way to see and understand about life being pos. There are 5 stages that we mentally/emotionally go through once you pass through just the senseless fear of being tested.

Stage 1-- You think being diagnosed as pos means a death sentence. Your fear is so great that you just about want to just die instead of the suffering that you think lays ahead of you. You can't sleep eat or even think. All you want to do is cry and find a hole to live in. But then comes.....

Stage 2 --You realize that the world didn't stop and that life actually still goes on . But you realize that life will never really be the same and you think of the what ifs. Each day that the sun rises and sets you find yourself accepting that this is here to stay .
You want to find out every bit of information that your hands can get a hold of . You research all the research. You inquire about lab work and the more you try to figure it all out the more your head just wants to go POP!!! Your totally overwhelmed by it all, exhausted and then comes .........

Stage 3-- You see that the only knowlege that you really need is that which pertains to you. And you see that although life has changed it's still ok . Sure you may wonder about who you can confide in . You learn about personal choices. You have a really good grip on what this all means. You may even being going to support groups to see how others are doing things with life. I call this also the color stage. That's when you see your life as a good thing again, The blues are bluer, greens greener, yellow brighter and reds bolder. Life actually looks good and you see that the problems in life that seemed sooo big are really quite insignificant now. This is a life changing stage that brings you to ......

Stage 4-- You want to help others that are just coming to terms with their diagnoses. You share how its not really any big deal, that there are worse illnesses that are unmanagable. You help them to see how in an odd way this diagnoses can actually be a blessing , Because you now see how precious it is and how you want all things to truly mean something. You may be back at work ( yes you can ) . Life actually looks like new opportunites . You see it's all just a matter of ATTITUDE ! And finally comes

Stage 5--This is actually a stage that ALL folks pos or neg must face . And that is when our life will end. But since we have already looked at death in stage 1 , we now replace that fear with a more realistic approach. And this can be truly amazing. And alot depends on each individual. I had friends that embraced their death by planning it all out themselves. They didn't run in fear, they took charge and empowered themselves . They realized it was just another stepping stone in their journey , a new chapter in their lives. And I can say I am soo blest to see the example they showed me.

I know this was long , but I believe well worth the insight.

Look up to the Heavens for the answers to Lifes questions .

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